


Always been him

by AnnaDreyar



Category: Naruto
Genre: Comfort/Angst, Community: kakasaku, F/M, Family Drama, Haruno Sakura-centric, Hatake Kakashi-centric, Relationship(s), Rokudaime Hatake Kakashi, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-22
Updated: 2019-10-10
Packaged: 2019-11-03 19:41:42
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 14
Words: 41,292
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17883974
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnnaDreyar/pseuds/AnnaDreyar
Summary: It all began with a few exchanges of looks and touches that made her wonder how she had not noticed him before. Their path broke apart against her will and she tried to move on, but after a while he returned to the place from where he should never have given up, making her realize that always been him. [KakaSaku]





	1. Long time away from home

He walked from the streets of Konoha observing all the changes that had occurred in the place he once called home, even though it was when he was still a child. He knew that many things had changed, including the people, after almost ten years of absence. Old colleagues had either married or given up working as a shinobi, some people he had never imagined would ever get married, had found their mates. When he received a wedding invitation from his ex-sensei, a marriage he obviously did not attend, he was really curious, not quite enough to read the invitation, of course. But what was making his stomach burn with anxiety at that moment was to see, after all this time, as the only woman he had in his arms in all his life, was living.

He refused to think she had moved on with another man besides him. Knowing Sakura, she would be waiting for him until now and would welcome him with open arms and an annoyingly beautiful smile on her face.

Naruto said that Sakura moved and that it was not a good idea for him to go see where she lived now and for some reason completely unknown to him, Naruto made him promise not to destroy the village when he found Sakura again. He did not understand the reason but promised anyway, not wanting to alarm the irritating blond that he called a friend.

When he left Naruto's office, he went straight to the old house he shared with Sakura before he left years ago. When he found nothing but dusty furniture, it was the first time he had felt distressed since discovering the real reason why Itachi killed their parents and destroyed his clan, he hated that feeling.

He walked down the dirt road a path at the ends of the city, a little far from the center. He glanced around realizing that the place was a bit isolated and wondered how Sakura, who had always liked the hustle and bustle of the city, decided to live in such a quiet place and away from it all. He spotted a reasonably large house with a white fence around a well tended garden. Without hesitation he reached out and opened the small wooden gate, walked toward the door and knocked before he could think straight and back down the same path that brought him there.

After a few seconds, a girl who appeared to be no more than five years old opened the door with a smile on her face and curious eyes. He felt an uncomfortable weight fall on his stomach as the pink-haired, green-eyed girl who reminded him of his former teammate stared at him suspiciously before opening the mouth. "Mama, there's a man at the door." The little girl screamed in a shrill voice, ripping him out of a state of torpor he had not even noticed had fallen.

"Sora-chan." A voice that he remembered very well, called from inside the house and a few seconds later he saw Sakura with short hair and the usual red dress that now showed part of her belly, wiping the hands on a dishcloth as she walked to the little girl before him. She looked at him with wide eyes and obvious disbelief. "S-Sas..." He watched her stutter and felt like touching her.

"Hey Sakura, what happened." A male voice called with obvious concern.

Sasuke looked puzzled when Kakashi appeared behind Sakura, but he thought it was normal for his old sensei to be around Sakura and Naruto as he always was. Kakashi looked at him for a few seconds and he could see the wrinkle around his eyes that indicated that beneath that mask that was still irritating, even after so many years, there was a smile. "Yo." Kakashi greeted casually and Sasuke nodded as he always did. He felt the weight in his stomach disappear when he saw that some things were still the same.

"Papa, who is he?" The girl who was a copy of Sakura pulled Kakashi's blouse when she asked the question that made Sasuke's heart tighten, with that phrase he felt as if he had been hit by a ton of bricks. He realized that Naruto was right and cursed the moment he promised that he would not destroy Konoha because the anger that was burning inside him would only disappear when he destroyed something or someone, who at the moment might very well be his old perverted sensei.

The realization hit Sasuke in full, the person with whom the sensei got married was his Sakura, the mother of his only daughter. Sasuke retreated unconsciously feeling like if he had been sucked into an alternate universe.

"Sasuke-kun, come in, we have a lot to talk about." Sakura's sweet voice reached his ears making him realize that everything was very real and that he had spent too much time away from home.

* * *

 


	2. Those Eyes

It was soon after the Fourth Ninja War, maybe it started a little before that, she was not sure. All she knew was that those looks were too intense to be ignored, the occasional touches when his hand accidentally touched her thigh or hip and lingered there for a while, might not be as innocent as they seemed to be to anyone who saw outside, and those whispers were too close to the ear to be unintentional.

When Sasuke and Naruto left Konoha seven years ago, their relationship which was never much of a teacher and student, became something of mere acquaintances who greeted each other on the streets when they met by chance. But when she grew up and Naruto returned, they approached something that could be called friends. When Sasuke left after the war and she became the Hokage's assistant, they became close friends. Too close for her not to wonder what the hell was going between them.

During the war he had saved her a few times by making her realize that he cared for her more than she believed. When she was completely unprotected and Naruto screamed for Sasuke to protect her, she felt a thick chakra that was obviously Susano'o and knew immediately that it was not Sasuke who had protected her. As she was falling toward certain death in a lava well of one of Kaguya's dimensions she knew that his arms would not let her fall. Soon after the end of the war, his rise to the post of Hokage and the departure of Sasuke, who again refused to take her with him. She found herself much closer to her perverted ex-sensei and was surprised to see him let her in more and more.

Pushing the thoughts to the cracks of her mind from where they should not be trying to get out, she concentrated on the activity of filling the paper cup that was in the hands with the coffee from the old coffee pot that was on a table in the old office.

Walking toward the office doors toward the exit, she found herself wondering once again if it would be good to wait until he returned before running for the last shift at the hospital. Shaking the head slightly to get rid of the treacherous thoughts that always invaded her mind without her having any control over them, Sakura walked toward the large office door.

Before she could leave, she felt a shiver run down the spine as the familiar chakra allowed to be known by her. She walked over to the main office desk that was now dark after she turned out the lights and thought he had been there for a long time and let her know only after the lights had been purposely turned off. Leaving the coffee cup on the table she put the briefcase on the table too and looked around. "How long have you been here?" She asked, trying to sound so casual as possible.

"This matters?" He said in that husky, lazy voice that always sent shivers down her spine no matter how hard she tried not to be affected.

She sighed and turned slowly to his voice that was near the wide window that had a perfect view of the entire city, she belatedly noticed that the curtains were closed, even though she herself had left the curtains open a few minutes ago. It only made her wonder what his intentions were at that moment. "Shouldn't you be out solving some problem or preventing the Fifth shinobi war?" She asked without looking into his eyes.

He laughed with amusement, not realizing that the sound made her feel butterflies floating in the stomach. "Sakura-chan, I'm an adult man who knows the responsibilities." He took a few steps toward her, pinning her body to the table. "You can't blame me for wanting to get you before you run away from me." He said it in a lower tone than usual, too close to her ear making her breathe heavily with the proximity.

"Kakashi." She said in a scolding tone, putting the hands on his chest to keep him at a distance she would consider safe to keep her sanity intact.

"Say again." He commanded, with the voice even more hoarse making her look up.

_'Damn it'_. She cursed when was caught by those gray eyes that seemed to want to hypnotize her. Who was afraid to look him straight in the eye when he still had the sharingan, had no idea how even worse it was to face those eyes without the sharingan. He had a way of holding her in some perverse kind of genjutsu that she could not shake off, even if she tried hard.

"Kakashi." She said again, obeying his demand. But this time there was despair tied to her tone. He realized this, using the advantage like the good and opportunistic shinobi he was.

"Don't resist, Sakura. You know you want it so much I do." He whispered, approaching to her lips. She bit the lower lip and he smiled knowing she had lost the battle she was fighting with herself.

"Just one more time." She whispered in warning and knew there was a smile under the mask. She untied the hitaiate on his forehead and tied it over her own eyes. She would never admit it to herself, but the feeling of not seeing what he would do to her made, her strangely excited.

She felt the soft, warm lips drain into hers and opened her mouth like a silent invitation. She felt when his hands snaked around her waist and he helped her sit on the wooden table she was leaning against. His lips left hers to rest on the skin of the neck where he licked, taking a few moans from her.

"You like this, Sakura-chan?" He whispered in her ear and she did not lose the way he stroked over her clothes, making her wonder how long he would hold on himself because of her.

She allowed herself to fall completely into the spell he had cast on her and was lost in his smell and the way he made her feel desired. He kissed her with a passion that she always wanted but never received and she told herself every time a few kisses would not hurt any of them.

* * *

The next morning she jumped on the rooftops toward her apartment that was next to the hospital and came through the bedroom window, taking off her clothes, throwing them in the chair by the window, taking an orange shirt from Naruto that was lying on the dresser, wearing the shirt while she walked to the bed where she laid unceremoniously for much-needed sleep.

A knock on the door made her jump out of bed, looking at the clock hanging on the wall next to the wardrobe. She cursed in a low voice for sleeping only an hour before someone disturbed the precious sleep. She walked to the door irritated and drowsy, opening with more strength than really needed. "What?" She asked obviously pissed.

"Oh, calm down, pretty girl." A female voice said with amusement and Sakura stepped out of the way for the intruder to enter the apartment. "Hard night?" Ino asked with a laugh.

"I need to sleep." Sakura grunted as she fell facedown on the couch without caring that her panties were showing up, after all Ino had already seen her in more embarrassing situations.

Ino walked and sat in the armchair that was next to the couch looking at the pitiful state of the friend. "You can take a break from the hospital." Ino suggested.

"I love what I do." The weary, muffled by the cushion, voice echoed through the living room.

"Then ask the Hokage to find another assistant." Ino insisted.

Sakura turned the face to look at her. "Kakashi-sensei would not know what to do without me." She said emotionless.

"Hmm..." Ino thoughtfully tapped the chin. "How about a vacation?" She did not even expect Sakura to process the question before continuing. "You could go out with Sasuke-kun on his journey around the Continent, huh?" She finished with a smile and raising the eyebrows, suggestively.

Sakura used the last ounce of energy she had to sit and face Ino. "I sent several messages for the last year and he never answered me, Ino."

"Oh. He must be really busy." She tried not to throw salt on the wound she knew was open in Sakura's heart.

"He answered Naruto every time and last week a scroll came of him reporting his actions to Kakashi." Sakura said without emotion.

After a few minutes of awkward silence Sakura sighed heavily. "It's not like we're together anyway... He didn't ask me to wait for him, he may never come back, you know?"

Ino walked over to the wine-colored couch and sat down next to her. "You still love him?" She asked in a low voice as if they were talking about something forbidden and maybe it was, after all the friends were wary to put Sasuke's name around her.

"I'm always going to love him, just like I'm always going to love Naruto." After a short pause she continued. "Maybe Sasuke will never love me back, Ino. I don't know if he wants me to wait for him. I don't want to wake up one day when all the people around me, are living their happy lives with a family and realize that I left my chance to be happy to pass by waiting for someone who never wanted me."

Ino looked at her with a look that Sakura knew very well and hated with all her might. That look that said she was seeing through her and even without using the Yamanaka clan lineage jutsu she could read Sakura's mind like an open book. "There's someone, is not there?" Ino said with narrowed eyes in obvious suspicion.

Sakura opened and closed the mouth a few times before sighing in defeat. "No." She thought she should not consider hot kissing sessions with Kakashi as a relationship worth mentioning.

"Don't lie to me, Forehead." Ino screamed indignantly and Sakura knew she was angry over the use of the annoying nickname she had not heard in a long time.

"Seriously, Pig... Forehead?" Sakura replied in disbelief.

"Oh shut up and tell me the truth." Ino snapped.

"Ino, or I'll shut up or I'll tell, pick one." Sakura mocked, testing the limits of her friend's patience.

"Sakura..." Ino said in a warning tone.

"I've had a good time with a person who I'll not saying the name. But it's nothing serious and that's all I'm saying." Sakura said faster than she intended, hoping that Ino would not question but when her friend's eyes widened she knew she was out of luck.

"I want all the succulent details, you cheater. How long have you been keeping this from me? I always tell you about my relationship with Sai". She threw a cushion at Sakura who was too tired to deflect.

"First, you make me hear about your relationship with Sai against my will, seriously Ino, I don't want the details of your life. Second, I'm not hiding anything from anyone..." Sakura tried to buy time.

Ino was not having anything what she was trying and cut her. "I know you, don't try to cheat me."

Sakura screamed in obvious frustration. "It's an old friend... We've been spending a lot of time together over the last few months and..." She looked away with embarrassment. "There was a day that we were too close and I don't know who approached first but we kissed, it was my first kiss, after Naruto, but I don't even know if Naruto was considered a kiss because..."

"Sakura, you're rambling." Ino interjected.

"Okay, we've been kissing a lot since then." She concluded.

"How much time?" Ino asked curiously.

"A few months, I think." She said biting the lower lip.

"Do you like him?" Ino decided not to push on the identity of the secret guy, meeting Sakura, she would eventually say when she was sure about what she felt about the person.

"So much." She said with a smile. "Ah Ino, I have loved him like a friend for some time but in the last few months I have developed a feeling for him that I had never thought could exist." She blew out.

Ino found herself smiling. "I have the slight impression that I already know this mysterious person."

Sakura fell on the couch and threw the legs into Ino's lap. "I don't want to fill my heart with hope to be rejected again, but with him I feel like I want to take the risk, do you understand me?"

"Then, take a chance." Ino encouraged her knowing that all she needed to move forward was a word of support and she more than anyone wanted Sakura to have a chance to be happy with someone who loved her back.

* * *

Kakashi was sitting on the tall tree trunk with one hand resting on his bent knee while the other leg was stretched out over the trunk of the tree. He looked up at the blue sky, enjoying the little peace time he had before he locked himself in that office for the rest of the day. Sakura would not show up today since she had a shift at the hospital last night which would leave him alone to his thoughts without her radiant light to illuminate the darkness that was his life.

He did not know what took over his mind the night he bent down to kiss her while they were reviewing village projects in the office, but the moment his masked lips landed on her lips, he knew he was doomed. When she closed her eyes and leaned over to kiss him back, he was sure that the whole relationship between them would completely change and he knew that all the looks and exchanges that had been going on in the last few months were not unilateral.

He yielded to the desires that had consumed him since the war and took the hitaiate from his forehead, covering her eyes so that he did not see his face and was glad she did not question. He bent down toward her realizing that the height difference was considerable and kissed her fervently, taking advantage of her surprise to be completely in the dark, to plunge his tongue into her mouth, exploring all the sweetness that emanated from her.

He thought she was very cute with all the shyness she showed at the beginning, her cheeks flushed and her hands uncertain, but being the ferocious kunoichi she was, Kakashi found himself being pushed back into the chair with Sakura climbing into his lap commanding the kiss, making him doubt that was her first.

Kakashi groaned unconsciously just at the memory of their first kiss that had been months ago, not that he was counting anyway. But a doubt would not let him go further with her, he doubted she had completely forgotten the Uchiha she had been in love with throughout her teenage years. Though she was nineteen now, he still suspected she was waiting for Sasuke's return and it made him feel like if he had lost her before he even had her.

He was opening to her every day more and for the first time in his entire life he was letting someone in. The walls he built around him to keep people at a safe distance were not working against her and instead of pushing her like he usually did when feelings threatened to take root in his heart, he was bringing her more and more close.

In every conversation they had, he ended up letting something about him slip away that he never told anyone and when she smiled or hugged him to comfort, he did not feel pathetic as he thought he would, on the contrary, he felt complete as if the pieces of an incomplete puzzle were being embedded slowly. This conclusion terrified him endlessly and he knew that as everything in his life she would be taken from him too, being only a matter of time. He just did not know whether he would take advantage of the time he was allowed to be beside her, or whether he would walk away from her completely before they were both irreparably injured.

He looked at the scroll that was in the hands once more and knew that the day she would be taken away was closer than he expected leaving a bitter taste in his mouth and a feeling of emptiness that he knew very well.

 


	3. Secrets and regrets

He lost himself in her dazzling smile while she stared at him as if he were very important to her and for few seconds he allowed to think that perhaps he was. That glow in her green eyes made his chest heat up with something he had not felt in a long time and did not want to stop to think about what it was, anyway. It had been more one year since the arrangement between them had begun and he was more than happy to have her all to him. Not that he was counting the time.

"Why do you wear the mask?" She asked in a timid voice as she lay on his chest.

Kakashi felt an eyebrow rise with surprise, he hoped she'd asked that question years ago, but neither she nor the boys had questioned him about it, and even if they did he would never give a true answer. But lying on the soft carpet of her living room while she lay lazily on him reminded him that she was no longer that annoying genin in love with the Uchiha boy, she was one of the strongest kunoichis among the five nations and the woman by whom he was in love for the first time in all the miserable years of his life, which was too long for an elite ninja. Not that he was going to announce it out loud.

With a sigh he took a more comfortable position. "When I was four, I found a scroll with the Uchiha seal on my father's things." He laughed lightly at the thought of the most foolish thing to come. "I imitated the hand signals in the scroll until I got what I wanted."

Sakura lifted the head, leaning the chin against his chest to look at him better.

He saw the glint of curiosity in her eyes and smiled. "I was able to produce a small fireball." He saw the flash of pride in her face and laughed again knowing that that pride would disappear soon. "My father get in the room at that exact moment and with the shock of being caught I lost my concentration, spreading fire all over the lower part of my face."

Sakura's eyes widened in surprise but he continued. "I used the mask to hide the horrible mark that ruined my face and kept it even after it was completely healed."

Sakura bit her lower lip and stared at him. "I always thought it was something about hiding what you really feel and keeping others away." She said uncertainly.

Kakashi has always loved her sagacity. "The reason for using the mask in the first place may have been the burn, but that's exactly what you said I kept." He clarified.

Sakura did not know what to think after this statement and decided to change the subject. "Well, I think Sai won the bet, then."

Kakashi stood still for a few seconds before the realization struck him. "Oh, Team 7's bet on what I'm under the mask." He said with a funny tone.

Sakura snarled playfully. "Urgh, you always knew about the bet, didn't you ?!"

Kakashi laughed out loud. "Yes, let's see." He tapped the chin thoughtfully. "Naruto says I have rabbit teeth, Sasuke bets on fish lips, Sai bets on scars..." He took a lock of her hair and curled it on the index finger. "My beautiful cherry blossom, bet I'm too ugly to want to show." He paused for a moment. "It makes me wonder why we're here, right now." He said with malice.

Sakura smirked. "You can be awfully ugly, sensei." She provoked. "But you're still a good kisser."

Kakashi sat up abruptly, pushing her back on the carpet. "Alright, time for lesson, my favorite student." Before she could respond he put one hand over her eyes and lowered the mask giving her a breathtaking kiss.

When they separated, he put the mask in place and took the hand from her eyes. She stared at him with narrowed eyes. "There are no scars, is there?" She asked, knowing the answer. Because even if she did not see him, she ran the fingers over his bare face and never felt marks beyond the visible scar in his eye.

Kakashi laughed and she answered punching him in the shoulder for denying her one more time.

* * *

It was a sunny Sunday and Sakura looked out the kitchen window wondering when the first rain would fall on Konoha, starting the rainy season that would begin soon. She filled the dark blue mug with tea and walked into the living room delivering to the man who was lazily sprawled on her couch.

"Do you want to talk about that?" She asked as he sat down and took a sip of his tea.

Kakashi kept the eyes closed and drank the delicious tea she offered. He sighed as he remembered what she was talking about. The previous day in a conference with ambassadors from another country he met an old friend of his father and the man did not stop talking about how he would never overcome the fact that the great White Fang of Konoha ended his own life, leaving the only son to own luck. Even with Kakashi's obvious discomfort, the man did not shut up for a single minute in the three hours they spent in the boardroom giving Kakashi an unbearable migraine.

Once more he was willing to tell her everything about his past, as if she had some kind of spell that would open his heart instantly, simply by looking into her eyes.

"When I wasn't even in Academy, my father was sent on a mission that put the lives of his comrades in danger, he chose to abandon the mission and save his comrades. The failure of that mission made my father be defamed for all in the Fire Country. The villagers of Konoha and even those he had saved, blamed him. Then, when I was eleven years old I arrived from my day in Academy and found his dead body in one of the rooms. There was no damn letter of goodbye. "

Sakura felt her heart race with every word he uttered and felt a sharp pain as he spoke with so much pain and contempt from a man she knew he loved and admired one day.

Kakashi felt the mug being ripped out of his hands and opened the eyes to see Sakura nesting into his lap like a lazy cat. She put one hand on his chest while the other wrapped his back. "Not everyone is strong enough to withstand rejection and accusations." She said in a low, compassionate voice, he was sure he was only able to hear because of the sharp senses he inherited from the Hatake Clan.

Knowing very well that if anyone knew how to overcome rejection was this woman snuggling in his lap, he hugged her tightly. "Thank you." He whispered to her, grateful to have told her about the past.

He was surprised that Sakura did not say that his father was a coward or a selfish for leaving him when he was still so young. Unlike everyone else, she understood Sakumo's motives and this gave Kakashi a reason to understand too. Fot the first time since he had found his father's dead body he felt that he had forgiven the man for leaving him alone.

* * *

The night was hot and muffled and Sakura asked the heavens for the rainy season to arrive soon. She put the glass she had used to drink water on the table and walked back to the room where Kakashi lay sprawled on the bed. Some nights when they kept checking the papers late into her living room, he would eventually fall asleep on the couch and she would carry him to the bed where they would sleep together.

She was happy with this arrangement, even Kakashi having threatened to send her on a suicide mission if she told someone she carried him like a princess to her bed. She smiled at the man lying on the bed in only a shorts and a mask and wondered when he would make her his once for all. Shaking the head to keep off the inappropriate thoughts, she walked over to the bed and lay down beside him.

At dawn she awoke with Kakashi panting beside her. Sitting abruptly she realized he was having a nightmare and knowing that it was not the best ideia to wake up a shinobi during a nightmare she placed the hand gently on his chest and sent soothing chakra through his chakra paths.

Kakashi opened the eyes as soon as he felt something warm penetrating his body, he was grateful to have awakened him from the horrible nightmare in which he was trapped. He sat, looking around a little stunned and after a few seconds he calmed down and realized where he was. He looked away to find Sakura's sympathetic face. "That's okay, it was just a nightmare." She whispered to him.

Sakura watched intrigued as he ran to the kitchen sink and washed his hands frantically. She knew he knew she was there but he would not look at her and that was making her uncomfortable. She walked over to him, turned off the faucet and forced him to face her. "Tell me what's wrong."

"Let it go, Sakura." He said with a serious tone that meant there would be no argument.

She did not know if it was the irritation due to the heat or the way he spoke to her as if she were a child, but she felt her temper rapidly exhausting. Holding his face in her hands, she forced him to look at her. "Tell me." She said through gritted teeth. "Tell me what's wrong."

Kakashi stepped away from her and rested the hands on the sink. "The blood never goes away." He said with a somber tone.

After a few long minutes of silence Kakashi felt her arms around his waist. He closed the eyes tightly and for the first time since he was eleven years old, he did not feel alone. It was as if a huge weight had been ripped from his shoulders.

"Look." He heard Sakura's sweet voice echo through the silent kitchen. He opened the eyes to see her hands before him, while her body was still comfortably pressed against his back. "There's a lot of blood here too."

Kakashi could not hold back the hoarse laugh that escaped his throat.

"I don't deserve you." He said as he tightened her arms around him again.

* * *

Rain fell by the glass of the office window and she traced the path one of the drops had with her finger.

He did not lose as her nails were beautifully painted with a dark enamel, matching the wine color of the blouse she wore, he had long realized that she was taking care of much more of the physical appearance now that she was off the active list, being too busy with the hospital and the paperwork he was supposed to take care of. He admitted to himself and only to himself that without her, he would be completely lost in command of that Village.

Tired of being a good man and resisting the temptation she was, he approached her and lowered the curtain, hiding the two from the rest of the world. He put his hand over hers that was still in the window, lowering the mask with the other hand to kiss the back of her neck that was deliciously exposing to him, since her hair was stuck in a messy bun.

She felt his bare lips touching the back of her neck and suppressed a sigh as a shiver ran down her spine as she suppressed the urge to turn and glimpse his face that she longed to see for so many years now, an desire that has increased exponentially in recent years because of their proximity.

With the lights off, the curtains closed and the torrential rain falling outside, the room was dark enough for Kakashi to feel comfortable lowering the mask. The only people who had seen his face since his father died were Ayame and her father when he left them intentionally just to irritate the students who were blatantly trying to see under his mask. He had never felt comfortable to expose his face to others, not even in the dark, but with Sakura it seemed like everything was different now.

Sakura turned slowly, keeping the eyes looking down to give him the privacy she knew he appreciated. She kissed his chin, earning a sigh from the man who always seemed so reserved and controlled before everyone, even in the most difficult or disconcerting situations. Then she kissed with the mouth openly on the jaw and blew where she had kissed, teasing him purposefully. She bit his chin lightly and then his lower lip. "You're enjoying this." He said in a trembling voice that surprised her and left her feeling incredibly confident.

"You have no idea." She answered with a bold tone.

Kakashi snarled and grabbed her by the waist, moving the two too fast for her to process, setting her on the table, kissing her fiercely.

Sakura felt the stomach tighten and warm at the same time as she lost herself in his arms. When they drew back into a breath of well-deserved air, lightning struck the darkened sky, brightening the dark room for a brief moment, giving Sakura a glimpse of the face she longed to see for so long now.

She gasped at the glimpse of his face and even in that brief moment she could see how beautiful he was and the desire to see him clearly almost consumed her at that moment. She looked at him disappointedly when the room went completely dark again. "It's almost a sin to hide it from the rest of the world, Hokage-sama." Sakura teased him and see when he visibly trembled at the use of the title he hated so much and for a moment she wondered if he really hated it when she said it to him.

Kakashi's only response was another snarl as he pinned her to the table tighter, making her look at him. "Say again." He commanded with that imperative tone he always wore when he was walking on the thin line of the control he held so he would not attack her in a way he knew he would regret.

"I thought you hated the title." Sakura mocked, then lowered her voice to a seductive tone and whispered in his ear. "Hokage-sama."

When Kakashi took a step back and ran the hand through his hair in obvious frustration Sakura was confused by the change of attitude and came down from the table taking a few steps toward him. "What happened?" She asked as she reached out to touch him.

Kakashi turned away from her touch and took a step back, gaining distance. "I just need one minute." He said in a weak, almost regretful voice.

Sakura moved too quickly for him to notice in the disturbed state in which he was. "Kakashi, there's nothing you wanted to do to me that I don't want you to do. Believe in me." She calmed him down and ran her fingers down the back of his neck, happy to feel him relax under her touch.

"I'll regret that." He said sincerely and regretted letting the words leave soon as he felt her hand fall from where she was caressing him deliciously.

"I didn't know that you felt that way about..." She hesitated before naming whatever was going on between them and at that moment she realized that maybe they were not in the same place like she foolishly thought they were. "...That." She finished and the words seemed heavy on her tongue.

She stared at him expectantly, hoping he would refute or approaching of her. When he did not respond or made any move to stop her from moving away, she continued walking toward the door, taking the bag and jacket that were hanging by the door, leaving without looking back.

Kakashi froze for a few seconds after her exit and all he wanted was to run after her and bring her close to finish what they had started. When he heard that she wanted him to do everything he wanted with her, it was too much to bear but he held the control that was weak and almost slipping, remembering the damn scroll that was resting in the drawer of that table where he wanted to have her once for all.

Another lightning broke the sky, brightening the room where he was left alone mulling the guilty feeling for leaving the only good thing that happened in his broken life, to leave.

 


	4. He's back

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't know if I made it clear at some point but there will be SasuSaku in this story. I don't like this pairing in canon and I blame Kishimoto for having introduced us a Sasuke so cold and distant, and a silly Sakura when she's around him. But I'm going to try make them work here. Don't worry because my focus is in Kakashi. Stay with me.

Sakura left the building and stared at the torrential rain that was pouring down in front of her. She cursed herself for having asked for rain for almost two months and now that the request had been answered by the torrential rain's god, she felt almost ridiculous. Leaving all the frustration aside she ran toward the apartment that was only a few minutes away, strategically located at a good point between the Hokage Tower and the hospital.

She sent chakra to her feet and ran across the stone floor completely wet and slippery, relying on her dexterity as kunoichi not to fall. She avoided thinking about the man she had left behind and the way she was feeling scorned and discarded. Allowing the rain to carry all the bad feelings away, she ran without looking back.

Arriving in her apartment, she jumped onto the porch and undid the protective jutsu. Pulling a towel that was hanging on a hook for occasions like that. Discarding the soaked jacket, pulling off her boots and drying the hair coarsely, she opened the sliding door and entered the living room.

The moment she set foot on the living room floor she felt the familiar chakra and looked up. "How the hell did you get here before me?" She screamed outraged and turned on the light in the room to make sure she was really seeing what she thought she was seeing. "And how dry are you?" She screamed even more outraged to see him sitting in the chair, completely dry and in perfect condition, unlike her.

"Instant transport jutsu." Kakashi clarified in a monotone voice.

Sakura felt irritated with herself for not having thought of it and blamed the man sitting in front of her for leaving her in a state where the brain was not functioning in its entirety. "Of course." She declared and walked to the bathroom mumbling about the lousy idea of letting him see the hand signals to undo the protective seal on her apartment and something about privacy.

"How am I going to curse you for what you said earlier if you were right here?" She asked with less irritation, now that she was wearing a loose, dry shirt, which by the way belonged to the man in front of her.

Kakashi sighed. He regretted what he told her in the office, but he knew he would regret much more bitterly after what he was about to say. "Sakura..." At his tone, she walked over to the couch and sat down, placing the hands on her knees and staring to him completely, knowing that the tone indicated that he was about to say something she did not want to hear.

"I don't want you to think I don't have feelings for you." He said in a seemingly calm tone, but Sakura knew he was nervous because of the small tremor at the end of the last word. "Actually I've never felt for anyone what I feel about you." He almost whispered the last part.

She nodded a little stunned after his confession, but mentally braced herself for the worst she knew was coming.

He rubbed his left knee with the palm of the hand in a frustrated movement. "I want you so much, Sakura." He said in an almost desperate tone.

"So what holds you back, Kakashi?" She asked with a good measure of frustration.

"Sasuke is coming back." He said staring at her.

Sakura returned his stare and suddenly she understood what was going on in Kakashi's mind and she wondered how long he was mulling it. "And?!" She snapped.

Kakashi blinked a few times making her realize that this was not the answer he expected from her. He cleared the throat. "Sasuke is coming back, Sakura. Your childhood passion, the man you loved for more than half of your life-" Sakura's hand lifted in a movement that told him to stop and he felt like a child being rebuked and decided that it did not please him. For a brief moment he regretted every time he'd done that to her and the boys.

She sighed as she realized exactly where his line of thought was taking him. "Got it, Kakashi." She sat on the edge of the couch to approach the armchair where he was. "You think I still have feelings for Sasuke and thinks that as soon as he comes back I'll run straight into his arms, leaving you and whatever we've been doing together for over one year now." She looked to him with an expression he did not like at all. "I didn't know you thought so little of me." She concluded, completely offended.

Kakashi did not know what he was feeling at that moment but he went there to clarify things and that was exactly what he would do until that night was over. "I don't think you're a deluded little girl like you were at the age of 12. I've seen you grow up in a decided and gorgeous woman." He looked her up and down with his eyes full of something she knew very well and made her feel warm and adored. He went on. "I know you well enough to know about your loyalty."

"But?" She offered.

He knew she was smart. "But, I can't take it from you or from him." He said weakly.

"You're not making sense, Kakashi." She said in an angry tone again.

"Sasuke sent me a scroll." He took the scroll from his waistcoat and handed it to her. Both tried to ignore the shiver that infiltrated their bodies when the fingers touched. "He wants to take you with him."

* * *

The next morning a shadowy figure jumped through the tall trees in the vicinity of Konoha, ignoring the thin drops of the moderate rain that fell, moving the body so fast that anyone would lose. When Konoha's shinobi landed on the ground of the Village he had been away for so long, was met by an old friend who had a smile on face.

"Welcome back, Sasuke." Naruto said with a genuine smile.

Sasuke nodded and lifted his lips in a half smile that meant he was at least glad to have someone to greet him. He received the slap on the shoulder that Naruto gave him as a welcome signal.

"We'd better get out of this rain." He stated firmly and walked towards the apartment he held in Konoha, with Naruto walking beside him, chattering about all that he had lost in the time he was away.

* * *

Sakura was distracted, filing papers and medical records in the records cabinet in her hospital office. She cursed softly at the realization that she was putting the child files in the wrong place again. She blamed Kakashi and the damn talk the night before.

 _'I can't take it from you or from him, Sakura. I can't keep you stuck with me when you get the chance to have what you've always wanted.'_  Kakashi's voice still echoed in her mind, making her feel a little numb.

She replied telling him that she would always love Sasuke, just as she loved Naruto because they would always be an important part of her, just as he always would be. She explained how the love she felt for Sasuke had changed over the past year and all he said back was that she would never know how she felt about him until she saw him again.

She remembered that damn conversation all morning and ran her head over all the words Kakashi had told her.  _'I can't to steal the only chance that Sasuke has to be happy. He deserves a chance, you deserve it.'_

Sakura remembered calling him a ridiculous bastard trying to be altruistic at some point, but who could blame her for being angry or frustrated. She did not understand why Sasuke wanted her now, after almost two years away from the Village and her, without even answering the messages she had sent.

She admitted that she was in love with Kakashi and shouted that he was being irrational and completely controlling when he pushed her to another man when she knew he wanted her as much as she wanted him to, which led them to a session of fiery kisses where Kakashi did not even he worried about covering her eyes, but yet she kept them shut, ignoring what might be the only chance she would have to see his face.

There were more words exchanged and she realized that nothing she said would make Kakashi give up what he had put in his mind. She tried to understand. She really opened her heart and tried to put herself in his place for some time and still did not diminish the fact that she was feeling lost.

She hated not knowing how to feel. She wanted to be angry with Kakashi for simply deciding that trying on something with Sasuke was better than insisting on moving on with him. She wanted to be frustrated with all the tension between them that only made her want him even more than before. She wanted to punch something and at the same time curl into a ball and cry. She wanted to yell at Sasuke for sending that stupid scroll that made Kakashi decide to have a moment of protective and selfless mentor. But yet she was arranging these damn papers, trying to act like nothing was happening.

"Sakura-chan?" Naruto's voice lifted her from the thoughts and she congratulated herself for not jumping at the feel of his hand on her shoulder.

"Hey." She said weakly as she turned to face him.

"I call you for a while, but you did not answer. I sensed your chakra here and entered, but you didn't even notice." Naruto had a curious and slightly concerned expression adorning his features.

"I'm sorry, I was distracted." She said as she dumped the papers behind her and scratched the eyes to try to come back to reality.

"Oh." He exclaimed with a little humor. "Is it because someone is back?" He said with a clear smile in his voice.

Sakura took the hands out of her eyes to curse Naruto for that stupid insinuation but when she looked up she saw that Naruto had stepped aside revealing someone else in the room. She wanted to scream for not being attentive and caught off guard once more.

"Hi." Sasuke said weakly as he raised the hand in an almost timid gesture.

"Sasuke-kun?" She whispered and looked to him for a while realizing how much he had changed. He wore a cape with a strange color that did not suit him. A sash over the forehead that kept his hair in place, she thought a haircut would be more useful, but it fit him well anyway. The eyes were still piercing as ever, making him look like he could see into her soul with just a look and maybe he could.

"Let's have lunch together." Naruto said cheerfully, grabbing Sakura by the arm and pushing Sasuke toward the door. "Kakashi-sensei can't come because of Hokage's things. Sai and Yamato-taichou are on a mission."

Sakura stopped listening to him after that and concentrated on walking without stumbling as they walked toward the place they always went when they met.

* * *

At some point between Sakura eating the ramen and Sasuke telling about his travels, Naruto got up from the chair where he was sitting in the restaurant, after depositing the money for his share of the bill at the table, ran towards the exit shouting some excuse over his shoulder before to disappear. Sakura knew he was gone after seeing Hinata walking down the street, but said nothing. When she saw Naruto disappear completely through the window glass, she finally realized that she was alone with Sasuke.

"Too much work in the hospital?" He asked in a more hoarse voice than she remembered and was a little relieved that he was trying to start a conversation because she had no idea how to act around him.

She nodded. "I'm working on a project for a new children's department." She said with a smile with the thought of the project she was working with Kakashi, even though she knew she could not be ready in a few years due to money and paperwork.

Sasuke stared at her for a few seconds, absorbing all the changes in her. He thanked Rinnegan for allowing him to see every detail of the woman in front of him. She had the most delicate pink coloring her hair and he would never admit it to anyone, but he always thought it suited her. Her green eyes gleamed as she talked about her work and he admired how much she matured, even more than he, but he would never admit it either. The slightly faded freckles that were scattered across her cheeks and delicate nose gave an interesting contrast to the clear, smooth skin. He wanted to say out loud how beautiful he was, but he knew it was impossible for him, so he kept it to himself.

"Kakashi said you weren't involved in anything important." He said seriously.

"This is a long-term project." She finished eating and took a sip of tea, pushing the bowl of ramen aside, giving him full attention. "Have you talked to Kakashi?" She asked with trying not to sound too interested.

Sasuke nodded. "I sent you a scroll, which I imagine he showed you." Sakura thought he looked almost nervous but ignored. "I expected your answer, but Kakashi answered instead."

Sakura felt the jaw clench unconsciously at the thought of the man's audacity. "He did?" She said through clenched teeth hoping Sasuke would not realize how irritated she was.

He nodded again making her remember how much he liked to spare the words.

"When did you send this scroll, Sasuke-kun ?" She asked sweetly, taking another sip of the tea to calm herself.

He stared at her. "A few months ago." He clarified. "Kakashi answered right away, I thought you told him to answer, didn't you?" He asked with a frown.

Sakura sighed. "Kakashi showed me the scroll. yesterday." She said without guilt. "I still didn't have time to think about it, Sasuke-kun. But I'd like to know what Kakashi sent you." She smiled up at him.

"He replied by saying that you were not involved in projects and were off the active list, so you would have no problem leaving the Vilage, with me. He even sent me the scroll with a one-year mission, where you can come with me." Sasuke clarified.

Sakura absorbed that information and realized that Kakashi was getting ready to let her go for months now. She understood why he was spending the nights at her apartment the last two months and how he had enjoyed every minute of it with her. He was enjoying with her as much as he could before she left with Sasuke. _'That idiot.'_  She thought to herself, holding not to say out loud.

She decided to think about Kakashi later and focus on the problem before her. "Why do you want me to come with you?" She stared at him. "You didn't answer any of my letters and suddenly you want me to go with you on a one-year mission out of Konoha." Sakura surprised herself with the tone she wore with him, but she did not regret it.

Sasuke knew she had changed since the battle between him and Naruto that cost them both arm where he apologized and she called him an idiot. At that moment he knew that Sakura had completely changed and that maybe he had screwed things up a bit too much with her. But hearing her talk that way with him only made him want to conquer her even more. If there was a woman in the world capable of bearing all his faults and understanding how broken he was, he knew it was Sakura.

He would have to be honest with her if he wanted a chance. "I dot kn'now how to talk to you for letters." He admitted, surprising her. He squeezed the tip of his nose making her realize how uncomfortable he was to talk about it. "I write some words to Naruto and he understands. For the Hokage I write a simple mission report, but with you-" He paused. "I don't want you to think I don't care." He finished and leaned back in the chair with his shoulders relaxed, as if he'd taken a huge weight out theirs.

Sakura nodded, not knowing what to say after realizing how sincere he was and the way he looked at her was exactly as Kakashi was looking at her. She did not know what to do with this new information and once again she wanted to punch something. After a few minutes of awkward silence, she cleared the throat. "How long until you leave on this mission?"

This time he leaned forward. "Until we leave." He corrected her. "I'll wait until you decide, Sakura."

Sakura heard her name come out of his lips in a husky and almost purring voice and saw a small smile adorn the corner of his lips and at that moment she realized the size of the problem she was in.


	5. Don't decide for me

A few days after sinking her mind into hospital work and Hokage paperwork, Sakura realized that Kakashi was disappearing between long meetings and surveys around the city. An irritating voice deep in the mind told her that he was avoiding her. So after to arrive about that conclusion she decided to stay in the office until late, with the lights off and keeping the chakra completely masked.

As she was almost asleep, leaning against the large couch in the corner of the room, she felt the familiar chakra invade her senses and opened the eyes to face the fugitive who was now looking to her, at the low illumination of the lamp on the table. "Yo." He said weakly and she was absolutely sure he did not expect to find her there.

"You don't have shame?" She said angrily.

"Well, you know I wear this mask because-" He began to babble.

"Oh spare me of your rigmarole, Kakashi." She stood up and walked over to him. "You've been shamelessly avoiding me for almost a week." She pointed a finger at him and was surprised when he bit her finger.

She grimaced and pulled her finger back. "Even with that stupid mask, it hurt." She said poutingly making him laugh weakly.

"Kakashi..." She said, without anger this time.

He made a gesture with his hand indicating to her to go to him and she obeyed. He pulled her to sit on his lap and sighed as he buried the masked face in her breasts and nuzzled the head there, looking a lot like a stray cat. "I'm so sorry." He said with a muffled voice.

"You should." She responded as she stroked his hair. "Why are you running away from me?" She asked quietly.

"I'll not be able to keep my hands away from you otherwise." He tightened his grip on her.

"Why do you want to keep your hands off me?" She pushed the subject, wanting to tear it all away from him.

He lifted the head and looked at her. "Not to miss you much when you leave." He said in a monotonous tone and she felt a lump in her throat.

"I haven't decided anything yet." She said with conviction. "That's why I needed to see you." She took his face in her hands and looked into his eyes. "If we ..." She stammered. "If what we have is real, I want it, Kakashi." She did not look away from him.

"Did you speak with him?" He asked in a tone that did not let her know how he felt or what he was really thinking.

She nodded. He went on. "So you know he's really serious about you."

Sakura lifted from his lap and walked around the desk tried to keep the anger that was ready to explode, under control. "What do you know?" She asked, trying to sound calm. "You weren't there."

"I talked to him." He got up and walked, only a few steps away from her. "The look he had when he talked about you and how he was willing to take you with him, that look..." He sighed and ran a hand through his hair. "He really wants you, Sakura."

"This is not about Sasuke." She said seriously. "I'm here to talk about us." She pointed between them and took a few steps to get closer and then put a hand on his chest. "You and me." She put her other hand. "I want to know what you want, how you feel."

Kakashi felt his heart stop for a moment as he looked into those green eyes. "You know how I feel." He answered and covered her hands with his. "But you can't just think of me in this situation."

"You always think too much." She said in a whisper and kissed him chastely over the mask.

He put the forehead over hers. "You need to look at the situation as a whole, Sakura." He used that tone he always wore when he was trying to teach a lesson. "Analyze all factors and all involved and then make the decision with less collateral damage."

"This is not a mission." She answered.

He stroked her cheek with his thumb. "Go home tonight. Think of everything, every little detail." He insisted.

"I thought about it, all damn week." She moaned.

"If you had made the right decision, you would not be here now." He kissed her too, and they both kept their eyes closed, not wanting to go away. "He needs you. Believe me, I know."

"You need me, too." She said in a voice filled with pain and he knew she was holding back the tears that wanted to fall.

"Go home, Sakura." He said firmly this time.

"Don't push me away like that." She begged and felt his hands dropping hers, but she could not open her eyes for fear the tears would fall. When she finally calmed down and opened the eyes, he was gone and she felt a tear trickle down for the cheek without her permission.

The next day she finished the rotation at the hospital and after lunch with Sasuke and Naruto she walked to the Hokage Tower willing to tell Kakashi that she had decided. For the first time since she read the scroll Sasuke sent, she felt that she was at peace with herself.

She walked into the office with a smile on her face and put the bag in the usual place. When she sat down at the chair that belonged to her, she realized that some things were out of place in the table and she was intrigued because Kakashi never touched her things.

"Hey, Sakura-chan." She looked up when she heard the door open.

"Shika-kun." She greeted him, receiving a smile from him. "Hokage-sama has not arrived yet."

"Oh yeah, he'll be out today." Shikamaru walked over to the table and looked at her curiously. "Sakura, didn't he tell you about the relocation?"

"What?" Sakura asked confused and stood up to face him better.

"Kaka- Hokage-sama, assigned me to cover your duties as an assistant while you go on a one-year mission with Uchiha Sasuke." He clarified really confused that she apparently had not been informed.

"Oh." Sakura replied completely stunned and felt as if she had been hit directly in the heart. "Got it." She said weakly and walked to the door, pulling the bag off the hook without bothering to respond to Shikamaru who was calling for her.

That night she accepted Ino's invitation to drink, she was so stunned that she did not mind arguing with Ino about choosing the short, tight black dress the girl chose for her. She just wanted to get away from herself that night without caring what tomorrow would bring. She left the apartment willing to forget everything and in the middle of the way while being dragged by Ino while she ignored her friend's babbling about Sai and all the gossip she heard at the flower shop last week, Sakura decided she would not burn the alcohol on her system tonight. She would drink to oblivion as she learned from Tsunade.

Upon arriving at the bar, she sat at the table with Ino who brought a line of shot glasses on a tray and Sakura thanked the exaggerated amount of drinks for the first time in her life. She knocked over three at a time and Ino clapped the hands in satisfaction. "That's how you do it, pretty girl." Ino screamed and dropped her own shots, wincing and wondering how high was Sakura's tolerance.

After many drinks, Ino pulled her onto the dance floor on the left side of the pub that was chock full of shinobis and Sakura laughed out loud when Ino tripped and nearly fell to the floor. She realized that the purpose of that night had been fulfilled and she forgot everything while dancing beside her friend.

When they returned to the table she was greeted by Sai, Naruto and Sasuke. "Hey, you guys." She said with a smile and sat next to Naruto who was next to Sasuke, while Ino sat next to Sai in front of them. She completely lost the look that Sasuke was giving her as she got lost in Naruto's small talk and his whining about Hinata not being there because she had gone on a mission.

After a while she stood up towards the bar to get more drinks at Ino's request. "Hey, sweet cherry blossom." Genma's voice caught her attention, turning around to greet him back. She was surprised to see Kakashi sitting next to him with Yamato and Gai in front of them.

She felt her heart clench as all the feelings she was keeping away all that night fell upon her like a flood, making her feel suffocated. "Fleeing from your responsibilities, Hokage-sama?" She said with a mockery as she stared at him.

"I was dragged." He said with the same monotonous tone he always wore, but his eyes slid down her figure, admiring every curve accented by the tempting dress she was wearing.

"You fired me." She said with obvious resentment in the voice, not caring about the people around her who were looking at them.

"Wow, that was straightforward." Genma let go before taking a sip from the mug on the table.

Kakashi stared at her, recognizing the glint of anger in her eyes. "Consider it as an extended vacation." He said with an amused tone, hoping to improve mood.

She laughed, startling him. "Typical of you." She replied sarcastically and prepared to tell him everything she thought about these extended vacations and what she expected him to do with them when a hot hand landed on her lower back, making her lose the reasoning line.

"Needing some help?" Sasuke asked hoarsely before letting his hand slide down her hips lengthy. He picked up a tray and put the drinks the waiter had left on the counter so he walked toward the table they occupied across the bar. "You come?" He asked without looking back and kept walking.

Sakura felt her heart sink for some reason she did not know at that moment in her half-drunk state and looked in the direction of Kakashi's desk in the hope that he would take her in his arms and take her away from everything making her feel better .

When she laid eyes on him she found him reading one of his Icha Icha copies as he always did when he wanted to get away from something. She felt a painful squeeze in her chest and her eyes burned with tears that she refused to shed. Gathering all the dignity she still had, she walked over to the table where her friends were and drowned in a glass, hoping to forget.

He was pushing her, he chose for her and did not even give her a chance to say what she wanted. She recognized the rejection when she saw, she had been rejected by Sasuke many times and had done the same with Naruto, times enough to know when she was being pushed away. But this time, it hurt a lot more than the others. She heard a strange sound echo in her ears and ignored, barely knowing that it was the sound of her heart breaking into a thousand pieces once more.

A few hours later Kakashi saw Gai lying on the table next to Yamato who was leaning on the bench with his eyes closed and sighted Genma somewhere in the bar in a contest with other shinobis, he seized the opportunity and walked discreetly to the exit trying not to look in the direction he knew she would be.

Against all that he had promised himself, on reaching the exit door he glanced over his shoulder towards her and saw her drinking next to Sasuke and Naruto. She laughed at something Ino had said but he knew her well enough to know that laugh was false even though she was a little drunk. He looked at Sasuke's arm that was leaning against the back of the seat behind her and congratulated the man for the use of the old trick. When Sasuke's arm fell slowly over Sakura's shoulder he decided it was time to get out of there. He ignored the lancinating pain that tightened in his chest at that moment.

He knew it was not fair to make her choose between them, so he decided for her. He imagined she allowed herself to get drunk instead of using her incredible chakra to burn the alcohol, just to forget the anger she was feeling from him. He knew she was annoyed that he had replaced her with Shikamaru, pushing her away, but he did not know what he would do if she said she would not leave with Sasuke and he did not want to know how he would feel if she said on his face that she was leaving. He would never admit it to himself, but he was just running away.

Deep in his mind he wished with all his might that she tell him she would not go, but this whole situation made him feel fearful. Something he had not felt since the war when he discovered that Obito had orchestrated all that plot against the nations because of an absurd idea of Infinite Tsukuyomi.

He landed on the Hokage monument from where he could see the whole village. He sat on the part of the statue of his mentor and sensei and stared up at the starry sky feeling a wave of pain strike him like an unpleasant tsunami. He realized he was more than in love with Sakura, he really loved her. When a tear trickled down the mask falling on his lap, he realized he might be making the worst decision of his entire life, leaving the only woman he loved to leave.

The thought that he had made many mistakes throughout his life made him realize that taking Sasuke's only chance for happiness was too cruel. Sasuke had suffered a lot in his life and Kakashi knew the feeling of loss and being alone. He did not want that for one of his students. He never said it aloud, but those three were the people he cared most about and seeing Sasuke and Sakura happy was enough to make him tell himself that it was just another sacrifice in a life of sacrifices of a shinobi .

Sakura did not remember how she got home but opened the eyes and felt someone pulling off her sandals gently. "Ino, help me with the dress." She sat on the bed trying to open the zipper at the back of the dress, too far for her to reach.

"I'll help you with that." Sasuke whispered before her after he had finished with the sandals.

"Sasuke?" She asked genuinely surprised to see him where she hoped it was Ino.

"I think we drank a little too much." He said with a smile that clearly showed all the perfect teeth, making Sakura realize that they really had ingested too much alcohol because she had never seen Sasuke smile like that.

"You have a pretty smile." She whispered and did not even realize what she said until she heard him say thank you.

He sat behind her on the bed and unceremoniously slid the zipper off her dress. "Sasuke." She screamed in surprise and managed to hold the front part before falling and revealing the lingerie underneath. When she felt a kiss on the shoulder and more kisses being spread around her neck, she forgot why she was resisting. "What are you doing?" She managed to ask, even feeling her tongue too heavy to speak anything coherent.

"Admiring you." He said with a conviction that terrified her.

"You what?" She turned to face him and realized that he was wearing only black pants that were too low at the waist. "Where's your shirt?" She asked with wide eyes seeing him half naked and acting completely non-Sasuke.

"Somewhere." He pointed to the ground and cupped her cheek with his hand, approaching him face from hers. "Tell me to stop and I'll." He whispered on her lips and she could taste the liquor he had ingested in the pub. "But you have ten seconds, because I'll not wait any longer." He said through gritted teeth and she got lost in his uneven eyes.

She stared at the purple whirlpool that occupied his old dark eye and found that eye too fascinating to look away. She felt his lips lay on hers shyly and realized that her time of choice was over. The hand he had on her cheek went up and pinned her hair between his fingers, bringing her closer.

Sakura did not know whether to push him away or pull him closer, but at that moment all she wanted was to forget. Making the decision that might change everything, she ran her tongue between his lips and at that moment he pulled away. She looked at him confused and noticed that his cheeks were red and it was not because of the alcohol. "You never kissed." She said before she could stop and watched as he frowned with obvious annoyance.

She smiled, the smile turned to a giggle and she found herself grabbing his face in her hands and pulling him into a kiss. Something inside her lit up as she realized that the great Uchiha Sasuke never let a woman touch him that way. She slid her tongue into his mouth and this time he accepted. When they entered a perfect synchrony she lay on the bed and felt his strong body covering her, she realized that at some point the sneaky shinobi had taken her dress completely.

After a while he let her go and looked away. She wore a black lace thing that made his belly burn with something he did not know and had never felt before. His short hair was spread across the pillow making her look incredibly tempting, and at that moment he found it a little hard to breathe. "You're so much beautiful." He said looking into the green eyes that stared at him shyly. He took a deep breath to compose himself and closed the eyes tightly trying to get out of the drunken stupor he was in. When he opened the eyes again she was still there and looked even more beautiful and tempting than before. He decided that she was the one he wanted for the rest of his life.

Sakura looked at him and saw desire burning in the dark eye as he stared at her blatantly up and down. When she felt his hand slide frantically over her body, she gasped. Closing the eyes as he kissed her belly and rose up to her neck without hesitation, she let herself feel his touch. "Make me forget." She whispered to herself and did not know if he had heard or not but at that moment she allowed herself to think of nothing that made her want to cry.

She was too drunk to care about anything and the things he was doing were making her feel good. She closed the eyes tightly as she felt warm lips kissing her everywhere and the image of a lazy and masked shinobi came into her mind, at that moment, for the first time since leaving the Hokage Tower, she smiled genuinely. "Kakashi." She whispered and smiled even more knowing that he was finally loving her the way she had wanted for so long.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please don't hate me, the things need to happen this way for the story to unfold. The next chapter is all about Kakashi.


	6. One year

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song in this chapter belong to Pearl Jam - Black.

Kakashi woke up with the sunbeams invading the heavy curtains that covered the apartment window. He was probably late for some appointment but refused to get up immediately, as usual. He pushed the green duvet with shuriken drawings and stared at the ceiling for a few minutes. A defeated sigh came out beneath the mask that covered his face before he rose from the bed.

He walked slowly to the kitchen and filled the kettle with water to make the tea. He opened the small tea box on the counter and sighed again. The dark wooden tea box was beautiful and it had been a gift, he loved that thing and hated it at the same time. She always said it was unhealthy to keep the tea herbs in an unsealed pot, not to mention the tea quality, her words. Another sigh and he ran the hand through his hair feeling more pathetic than usual. That tea box was beautiful and useful but it reminded him of her and it hurt more than he'd like to admit.

Everything around, reminded him of her. The photos he kept in a box under the bed, the few photos they took together after the war, when she caught him off guard and he hearded the click of the machine, that she had won from Naruto on her nineteenth birthday, it was late too much to cover the face with the hand or run away from the photo. When she brought the photo in print a few days later he would greet her with a smile. He was a man of few belongings, those pictures were precious gold to him.

The red cushion that still decorated the black and dull couch of the living room was there, untouched. She said it was only for her use and if she smelled a dog smell on that cushion he would suffer. He felt offended by her insinuation that his dogs smelled badly and before he finished the sentence, she laughed. He thought she had gone mad but she recovered and ran her fingers through his hair.  _'Your dogs are smelling good, they use the same shampoo as me, Kakashi. I'm talking about you. You'll leave dog smell on the cushion.'_

He wanted to feel offended, but he knew it was true and even if he started an argument, he would lose. Then he just threw her on the couch and made her feel his dog smell while he kissed her senselessly.

"Damn cushion." He said to the empty apartment but did not move to take the offending object off the couch. Almost one year now, he missed her.

* * *

_Sheets of empty canvas._ _Untouched sheets of clay_  
_Were laid spread out before me a_ _s her body once did_

_All five horizons revolved around her soul_  
_As the earth to the sun_  
_Now the air I tasted and breathed has taken a turn_

* * *

_'It was your fault. You pushed her away.'_  The Yamanaka girl yelled at him the day Sakura left.  _'She was devastated to have slept with him. And you know what was worse, she told me she thought he was you.'_  The blonde girl's angry cries echoed through his apartment the night she decided to give Kakashi a piece of her mind and everything she thought about him.

He did not know Sakura had spoken about them to anyone. Apparently she had not given names, but the angry blonde in front of him made the link when a depressed Sakura invaded the flower shop and poured her heart out after spending the night with Sasuke. She went to say goodbye to her friend, saying that she would go on a yearlong mission with the Uchiha and when Ino questioned her about the man she was in love with, Sakura opened her heart and wept over everything she had held for so long. Which brought her defensive friend to his door that afternoon, right after Sakura's departure.

When he heard Sakura had slept with Sasuke, he felt his heart sink. It was his fault, he knew. He saw her looking at him from the bar when Sasuke called her back to the table, but he buried his face in Icha Icha Paradise and ignored her. He saw from the corner of his eye as she gave him a wounded look and he felt guilty that night, but he chose the easiest way, not knowing that it would become the hardest way too fast. He regreted. One more regret in a life of regrets.

 _'She loved you.'_  That phrase echoed in his mind and sank into his chest like a poisoned kunai, he hated himself at that moment, the aversion he felt for himself was almost unbearable. He knew that Sakura wanted him, he knew she could be almost in love with him, he knew that what they had was too intense, but she real loved him. She loved him and he pulled her away without giving her the chance to say it.

 _'She could not stay, she said she couldn't face you after she'd given herself to another man.'_  Ino spat the words on his face. Sakura had ingested alcohol into oblivion and lay down with Sasuke. Knowing Sakura was obvious that she would not look at him after sleeping with another man, he knew that in her mind was screaming that she had betrayed him, but she did not, he knew better. It was his fault.

 _'I thought you were good to her.'_  She whispered weakly before turning around and leaving Kakashi to pick the pieces.

He would not blame her, he wanted to tell her that. It was too late, she had left that morning without saying goodbye to anyone besides Ino and probably her parents. Naruto almost felt offended, but let it go to know that his two best friends would be happy together after all. Hearing Naruto to say that, should have alleviated the pain he was feeling, after all that was the point of everything he did, but only sank the kunai deeper into his chest, bringing pain and a bitter feeling of loneliness. It had been almost one year now, he could still hear her sweet voice if he closed the eyes tightly.

* * *

_Oh, and all I taught her was everything_  
_Oh, I know she gave me all that she wore_

* * *

It was Sunday, which meant it was his day off. Day off until an urgent case appears to resolve and get him out of the day of laziness. Yamato had found him on the top branch of a tree reading one of his books and dragged him to the training camp that Team Seven always wore. He did not turn down the spar session, he would not tell his old friend, but he needed to let off some steam.

"You're distracted, Hokage-sama." Yamato's voice took him out of his thoughts, bringing him back in time to escape a kick aimed at his head.

"I'm not." He said with a smile and hit Yamato directly on the chest with a punch strong enough to make the man stagger back. "And don't call me that, Tenzou."

Yamato coughed and rubbed his chest. "It's okay, you aren't distracted, senpai." He managed to say and Kakashi laughed lightly.

They fell on the green grass panting and stared at the sky filled with clouds. Yamato saw Kakashi rubbing his fists, especially the hand with which he had hit the chest. "We're getting old." Yamato whispered to himself.

"Speak for yourself, Gai says I'm in the early spring of my youth." He said in a monotonous tone and made Yamato laugh.

Yamato sighed. "Sakura-chan and the Uchiha will be home soon." He said nonchalantly and lost the grip on Kakashi's jaw. "Surely he'll not staying for a long time, but I miss Sakura-chan. We can have lunch together when they get here." He lifted and wiped the dirt from his pants. "It's a beautiful day, enjoy senpai." Yamato left without knowing that he had completely spoiled Kakashi's day by reminding him that the woman he loved was in the arms of another man, exactly where he put her.

He wanted to see her, but seeing her would make him want to touch her and she no longer belonged to him. He lifted and wiped the dirt of clothes, deciding to go home, the sun and day were too beautiful for his mood now. He heard children running around him and laughing, lavishing joy that screamed that they were living times of peace. It did not make him feel better. It had been almost one year now, he wanted to see her and touch her, just one more time.

* * *

_And now my bitter hands c_ _hafe beneath the clouds_  
_Of what was everything_  
_Oh, the pictures have a_ _ll been washed in black_  
_Tattooed everything_

_I take a walk outside._ _I'm surrounded by some kids at play_  
_I can feel their laughter._ _So, why do I sear?_

* * *

The nights were always the worst. In the months before she left, they had slept together every night, taking turns between his apartment and hers, even though there was nothing but hugs, he had never felt so contented in his life. She would hug him and keep the nightmares away and when a nightmare could escape the safety net she put around him and into his messy mind, she would be there to calm him down.

He sat abruptly on the bed, scared and breathless, after seeing the face of a boy among the many fallen dead, the images of war were always the worst to have been recorded in the memory. He hated how in wartime the villages formed the shinobi earlier, as if life did not matter, only the amount of people wielding weapons was important. He lived two wars. Being the Hokage, he decided to work hard every day to keep the peace that came at a very high cost.

Things were fine because of Sakura, he knew. After she left, he and Shikamaru turned the office into a deposit of piles of paper. Late reports and projects that needed to be reviewed were scattered everywhere. He decided that postponement was not the way to progress.

Sakura would kill him when she saw what he had or had not done. She would kill him and then bring him back to kill him again and then do the same to Shikamaru. He laughed to himself at the thought of her screaming at them as he separated the papers and no matter how angry she was, she would do the job, that's how she was. He admired the incredible woman she became.

He drank a glass of water and walked to the bed with a satisfied sigh, even if she was not around, only the thought about her removed the nightmares, he found himself smiling at the ceiling. It had been almost one year now, he wanted to hug her in that bed.

* * *

_Oh, and twisted thoughts that spin round my head_  
_I'm spinning, oh, I'm spinning_  
_How quick the sun can drop away?_

* * *

Naruto entered the office after being announced and ran to the table, causing Kakashi to stop what he was doing and look up.

"Sakura-chan will kill you when she see this." Naruto said as he looked around at the piles of papers.

"Why do you think we're working so hard?" Shikamaru replied with some shadow of fear in his voice, making Naruto realize that he was not the only one who feared her fury.

"Eh, Kakashi-sensei." Naruto caught his attention again.

"I haven't been your sensei for years, Naruto." Kakashi replied with a twinge of rebuke but for those who did not know him well, it seemed the same monotonous tone he always wore.

"Hokage-sama?" Naruto said purposefully, knowing that Kakashi hated the title.

Kakashi moaned. "Continue with  _Sensei_." He said in a defeated tone. "Now, what can I do for you?" He asked with curiosity.

"Teme, send a scroll. They'll be back in a few days." Naruto said enthusiastically and ignored Shikamaru's murmur that he had to stop using childish pejorative terms if he wanted to sound serious when he assumed the position of Hokage.

Kakashi nodded and tried heavily to ignore the weight that had set in his stomach. He felt ridiculous for being anxious about their return. "How are they?" He asked, trying to appear indifferent but inside felt like something was eroding him, he did not like that feeling.

"And you think that bastard said something?" Naruto shouted indignantly. "He only said that they're on the way and will arrive in five days. I have come to report because we'll receive them at the gate. I don't want Sakura-chan to hit me because I'm not there." Naruto stammered and turned to leave to finish the training of good political manners that he was receiving of Iruka-sensei. "Be at the gate in five days  _in the morning_." Naruto shouted over his shoulder, emphasizing the part of the morning, knowing his late habits.

"We'd better finish this in five days." Shikamaru picked up another stack of papers, stamping with impressive speed.

Kakashi nodded and returned to reading. He tried to focus on the words before him but none of them made sense in his mind. It was five days to see her again, he did not know how to feel.

* * *

_And now my bitter hands c_ _adle broken glass_  
_Of what was everything_  
_All the pictures have a_ _ll been washed in black_  
_Tattooed everything_  
_All the love gone bad t_ _urned my world to black_  
_Tattooed all I see._ _All that I am._ _All that I'll be, yeah_

* * *

Five days later, Kakashi crawled to the gates of the village, finding Naruto halfway there. They waited for almost an hour until the glimmer of pink caught the pair's attention. Yamato and Sai were far from being seen and Kakashi remembered belatedly that they were late in returning from a mission in Suna. For the first time in a long time he was not the only one to be late.

"They're here." Naruto said with childish enthusiasm and Kakashi found himself smiling at the man's happiness beside him.

He felt the heart quicken and a lump formed in his throat as he watched her approach. She had cut her hair even more, the threads framing her face perfectly, there was a thin red cape covering her and she smiled at them from a distance, but he did not lose the way she looked away to the floor as her eyes found with his.

He realized with regret that she was ashamed of him and all he wanted to do was hug her and say that no matter what had happened in the past, he would always see her as the beautiful, pure woman she was.

"Sakura-chan." Naruto pulled her by the arms and crushed her in a tight hug.

"Naruto." She giggled and hugged him back.

When he released her she looked at Kakashi and looked away from him again, he wanted to hold her face in his hands and make her face him, but he knew that this gesture would raise questions of others and he did not want to hurt her, even more. "Sakura-chan." He said in a low voice and touched his fingers lightly in her hand.

Sakura sighed as she felt an electric shock invade every inch of her body at the mere touch of him. She thought that feeling had been buried deep in her mind and heart after all this time. She stared at him unconsciously and saw the heat that was reflected in the dark eyes that always held her. She could not look away and could not resist when he pulled her arm and hugged her, burying his face in her neck. She felt guilty.

She returned the hug and buried her face in his chest, smelling his scent discreetly. He still had the smell that always appears before a storm. She bothered him by saying that he smelled like dogs but she loved the smell of the storm coming from him. She never said it, but it made her feel safe, as if she belonged there. It had been one year and for the first time she felt that was in home.

* * *

_I know someday you'll have a beautiful life_  
_I know you'll be a star_  
_In somebody else's sky, but why? Why? Why?_  
_Can't it be... can't it be mine?_

* * *

"I'm sorry we were not here for the wedding, Naruto." Sakura sincerely lamented.

Naruto scratched the back of his neck nervously. "It was our fault for doing everything in a hurry. I know you were on the other side of the continent." He placed a comforting hand on her shoulder. "I'm glad you can meet my son, he's born any minute now. Hinata is huge."

"You may know ours before." Sasuke spoke for the first time and Kakashi felt his eyes widen in surprise.

Sakura pulled back the black cape of Sasuke to reveal a small package on his arm. She carefully picked up the little baby and showed them. "This is Sarada. She's three months old." She said with her cheek stained pink and a timid voice. She refused to look him in the eyes. He wanted to yell at her that he blamed himself more than she did and all he wanted was for her to look him in the eyes again, he wanted her to smile at him. But he could not utter a single word.

"She's just like Teme, but she's beautiful. I believe in miracles now." Naruto said playfully and got punched in the shoulder and a grunt from Sasuke.

"Do you want to hold her?" Sasuke asked, looking at Kakashi.

He nodded not knowing how to react, still numb with the news. Sakura placed the baby carefully in his arms and when that little thing with dark hair and round cheeks smiled at him, Sakura's voice warmed his heart one more time. "She likes you, Kakashi." She said in a weak whisper and he wished with all his strength that this baby was theirs.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know, it sounds cruel of me, but I promise that from chapter eight it will be all KakaSaku until the end. And just to remember, Sakura will not betray Sasuke.


	7. Don't blame me

_Current days..._

Sasuke walked through the open door, following Sakura into the house, he did not lose the possessive way that Kakashi held her, keeping his arm around her waist while the other hand held the small hand of the pink-haired child who was still staring at him with a suspicious look.

He felt his heart squeeze with each step inside the house, he noticed the simple but beautiful decoration, but still remained in a catatonic state, where he found himself totally breathless and speechless.

Sakura smiled sweetly at him and pointed to one of the comfortable upholstered chairs that were around the large table in the western-style dining room. He sat obediently, watching Sakura sit in the chair in front of him as Kakashi sat beside her. When the girl, whom he hated to admit but was completely cute and adorable, sat next to him and looked at him with suspicion and much curiosity in those bright green eyes, he felt a sigh escape of the lips, against his will.

"Are you Sara-chan's second father?" The girl asked in a shrill and delicate voice at the same time, which seemed impossible but being  _the likely_  Sakura's daughter with Kakashi, that little girl was certainly something to be seen, he admitted to himself. And even though it was a question he suspected she already knew the answer.

He stared at her and tried not to feel guilty as she stepped away from the angry glow that was in his visible eye, while the other eye was strategically hidden by the long strip of black hair. "If you're talking about Sarada, I'm her only father." He said firmly and watched as the little girl raised her eyebrows in obvious surprise.

The surprised state lasted little and was soon replaced by what seemed to be irritation, Sora frowned and Sasuke thought she looked a lot like her mother when she was annoyed with Naruto. "Mom says it's ugly to lie." The little girl retorted petulantly. "Mom said Sara-chan had another father, though Sara-chan always says that the only father she has is-"

"Sora-chan, go play in your room for a bit, while Mom and I talk with Uncle Sasuke." Kakashi said in a sweetly paternal tone, but Sora knew very well that it was imperative. She took one last look over her shoulder, staring at Sasuke before disappearing down the hall.

"When the hell did this happen?" Sasuke asked the second when Sora disappeared, he did not try to hide that he was completely annoyed, or perhaps mortified was the correct word to describe how he felt at that moment, he did not try to hide the offended look that stained his beautiful, usually stoic features.

Sakura was surprised to see him express so many emotions with a single glance and for a moment she was a little terrified at the confrontation, but she felt Kakashi's hand tightening hers on the table, giving her the confidence she needed. Sasuke did not lose the subtle gesture and faced the couple with a look that Sakura could not describe.

"Do you want the long version or do you prefer the short version of this beautiful story?" Kakashi asked in a completely disinterested and lazy tone, which he always wore with everyone, making Sasuke feel the anger increase more and more with each word.

"I'd rather not hear your voice at the moment, Kakashi. I'm having serious trouble trying not to kill you." Sasuke said between clenched teeth and clenched his fist tightly to make no threatening move, which Kakashi found an exceptional progress compared to the ruthless and merciless boy he was as a teenager.

"Sasuke-kun." Sakura said softly trying to appease the altered mood in the room and Kakashi realized the way Sasuke relaxed to the simple sound of his wife's voice, making him feel a twinge of jealousy. Sakura sighed as Kakashi released her hand and held his arm to rest in the back of the chair, surrounding her protectively, making Sasuke narrow his eyes at the older man's action. She noticed the exchange of glances and decided that it was better to act before it all went out of control. "Sasuke-kun, do you remember our last conversation, almost ten years ago?" She asked, hoping he would remember why he had no right to feel angry at this situation.

* * *

_It had been ten months since Sasuke had left on the last mission, though Sakura had sent six letters during his absence without any response, she was glad to see him come in the front door of the house he bought for them. In the seventh month of absence, he sent a small infant bracelet with a fan-shaped pendant, which Sakura had kept on Sarada's wrist since she received it. That was the only clue that he still remembered having a daughter waiting for him at home._

_She smiled sweetly at the man she'd cared and respected for the past two years and walked over to him. Sasuke gave a small smile that did not show the teeth, but Sakura knew that half smile was him showing that he was happy to see her, or at least she allowed herself to believe that it was. "Welcome back home."_

_"Thank you." He replied, taking off his dusty sandals and hanging the black cloak on the hook by the door._

_Sakura kissed his cheek and went into the bathroom to prepare a hot bath, knowing he should be tired from the long journey. "You didn't answer any of my letters." She screamed from inside the bathroom, waiting for him to hear her wherever he was in the house._

_He surprised her as he entered the shirtless bathroom, handing the sweaty, slightly dirty clothes to her. "I'm not good with letters, Sakura." He said in a low, calm tone._

_Sakura just nodded, not wanting to create a stupid argument when he'd just gotten home after so long gone. She looked down at his bare torso and remembered how much she missed human contact beyond that of her two-year-old daughter._

_Sasuke looked at the bathtub that was completely full of water and finished undressing, not missing the way that Sakura's eyes wandered over his exposed body with evident desire mirrored in her eyes. He remembered the cold nights he had spent in the woods and how he sometimes wanted her to be there to warm him. Surrendering to the lust that flooded him at that moment, he reached out, undoing the clasp of the dress she wore. "Where's Sarada?" He asked in a low whisper._

_"Sleeping." She answered in a hoarse voice and helped him take off her dress._

_..._

_The next day, Sakura woke up in the bed she shared with her Uchiha lover and watched as she reached for a warm body at her side just to find the wrinkled sheet. She opened the eyes, looking around the sunlit room and pulled the sheet over her body, remembering that she was not dressed. The opening of the door made her look that way and she smiled unconsciously as Sasuke entered with a faint smile on his face. "Good afternoon." He said with a twinge of amusement in his voice and Sakura loved to listen, knowing that it was rare moments when he demonstrated something beyond complete stoicism._

_"Did I sleep that much?" She asked, still sleepy._

_"I must have tired you last night." She did not lose the tone of arrogance he used in that phrase and laughed lightly at him. "I already gave Sarada's breakfast and I spent time with her before taking her to the nursery."_

_Sakura was surprised that he remembered her routine with Sarada ten months ago and was glad he was back. She got up from the bed, still holding the sheet around her body. "I'm going to take a shower and we can spend some time together." She declared with evident joy._

_When Sakura returned to the room, after telling the hospital she was going to take the next week off, she saw Sasuke preparing a backpack bigger than the one he used the last time he left, she watched him stuff his backpack with clothes, accessories and shurikens. Sasuke looked up, realizing he was being watched and looked at her for a few seconds. "I'm leaving late afternoon." He stated naturally and noticing the scowl that adorned her face, he decided to clarify. "We're going to spend the day together, I just go out at night."_

_Sakura still stared at him in disbelief, and all the desire not to quarrel that she felt last night completely dissipated. "You've been away for ten months, Sasuke. I thought you'd stay for at least a few days, hopefully a few weeks." She said in a flat tone and congratulated herself for not screaming when that was all she wanted to do at that moment._

_He realized that she was annoyed the moment she said his name without the affectionate honorific she always wore. He left the backpack that looked ready and walked toward her. "Sakura." He tucked a lock of hair behind the ear. "I was given a mission as soon as I arrived in the village. It's an investigation from the other side of the continent, it will take a lot of time just to get there, the sooner I get out, better." He tried to calm her down._

_"You and I both know that Kakashi doesn't care if you stay in the village. Sarada will have the happiest day of her life if you decide to stay with us for a few days." She said in a lower tone, hoping to convince him. She really wanted him to stay for a while, she was tired of feeling alone._

_He shook the head in denial and walked back to the backpack, placing it next to the bedroom door. "I need to leave, Sakura. You always understood." He murmured without looking at her._

_Sakura sighed feeling completely exhausted. "I always understood, maybe that was my mistake, I was always compassionate and maybe it made you don't understand_ _completely_ _how I really feel. You two always decide things by expecting Sakura to understand how she always does." She stammered, trying to keep the tears from falling. She would not cry in front of him._

_Sasuke wondered who she was talking about besides him, maybe was Naruto, she's always been very comprehensive to both of them since adolescence. He watched as she was completely lost in thought and waited for her to cry at any moment what would be something new, because he had never seen Sakura cry since his last fight with Naruto._

_"I understand that you have your duties to Konoha and that you feel you need to redeem yourself. I know your way of moving forward and honoring your brother's memory is protecting the Village from the outside, but I want you to stay with me, Sasuke. I want my daughter to have a father present. " She looked up at him. "I miss you."_

_He took a few steps toward her and took her in his arms, stroking the pink hair that always smelled deliciously sweet, making him feel in peace. He wanted to stay with her, he often wanted to drag her with him on his journeys, but he knew it was too dangerous for her or Sarada and he would never forgive himself if anything happened to them. He also knew that Konoha needed her, both the hospital when Naruto and Kakashi. He made many mistakes in his life, changing people's lifes that he cared about pure selfishness was not what he wanted. He wondered if he left because he did not have the courage to stay in the place he wanted to destroy one day and knew that it was selfish too, but he buried that thought in the back of his mind, as he always did._

_Sakura accepted the hug, wishing he would say something. After a few minutes of silence, she turned to face him. Looking at the unequal eyes she'd learned to find beautiful after a while, she kissed him lightly on the lips. "Wait a few more days." She asked hopefully._

_He sighed with obvious frustration and denied again with a nod._

_"Why?" She pushed, knowing that this could lead to an argument she never wanted, but she was too irritated to let go. She did not know how long it would take for him to return this time or if he would not even come back, only that thought made her heart squeeze._

_"I feel suffocated." He murmured very low, but she listened._

_Sakura blinked a few times realizing he was talking about staying in Konoha. She knew he had been broken since he saw his brother murdering their parents, and only that could make him hate the place where he lived the saddest moments of his life. She knew he felt guilty for many things, but she did not expect him to feel bad for being where she called home. She wondered why he had never said it before and was angry that he did not want to be with her and Sarada. If he loved her enough, he would endure a few days in Konoha, even if he felt suffocated._

_"Let's stay in home, away from everyone. You don't have to walk around the village if you don't want to." She said with a weak smile, trying to show him that she understood what he had said and did not intend to force him to walk where he did not feel well. Their home would be his refuge._

_"I can do this for you." He said with a little determination and affection evident in his voice, willing to walk the streets of Konoha if that made her happy, he pulled her through the door._

_..._

_They had a nice day together, walking through Konoha, she did not miss the way he greeted people with a wave as they passed them, she thought he was doing it for her and felt the heart warm, completely forgetting the small previous conflict._

_They reached for Sarada in the nursery and Sasuke spent the afternoon with the little girl who enjoyed every second beside his father before fainting from fatigue on the floor of the room with a small smile on her face. Sakura watched as Sasuke led her to the bedroom and covered her._

_She smiled and entered the room, taking a clean pajama to wear after a well deserved shower. Before she could leave the room, Sasuke walked in and walked over to her with a light touch on her forehead before picking the forgotten backpack aside the door._

_Sakura felt her heart sink and her eyes burned with tears that she refused to shed, again. After the hug he had given her and the incredible day they spent together, she was sure he would stay. "Sasuke-kun?"_

_He looked at her with obvious guilt on his handsome face. "I'm sorry." He said with even more guilt, putting his backpack on the shoulder._

_Sakura felt a fire fill her chest and a feeling of exhaustion took every inch of her body. She decided she was tired of feeling abandoned by the men she had chosen to love, she would not let Sasuke push her when she left everything for him, after all she'd given up. She remembered the unbearable pain she felt when Kakashi pushed her that night in the pub three years ago, she refused to feel that way again. She would not let Sasuke do the same. "If you leave tonight, I'll not be waiting for you if you back." She said coldly and passed for him going toward the hall._

_Sasuke had never seen that look on her face directed at him. It was the determined look she had on her face before a battle. He did not see that expression even on the day she said she was willing to kill him when she rushed at him with a poisoned kunai before giving up at the last second, giving him the chance to counterattack. He stared at the floor for a few seconds before making a decision._

_..._

_Sakura went back to the bedroom to find it empty. She ran to the entrance of the house where the cloak and his sandals were missing. She dropped to her knees on the floor, shedding all the tears she held that morning. She crawled to the couch determined not to lie down on the bed she shared with him. She wanted to scream to dispel the lump that formed in her throat, but she had to cry silently so the noises would not wake Sarada. She wondered what had gone wrong with her for always being pushed by the men she loved. She hugged herself on the couch in the dark room and told herself that it was the last time she cried for Uchiha Sasuke._

* * *

Sasuke looked at Sakura next to Kakashi, remembering the last words she said before he decided to leave that night ten years ago and felt a weight in the stomach to realize that he had brought it to himself. He told himself that night, Sakura would wait for him, as she always did, he had taken her for granted trusting that the love she always felt for him would be enough to cover his immense faults with her. He regretted leaving her behind with a daughter he should help raise.

He did not know if he hated more Kakashi for being there for them, or hating more himself for not being, giving the perverted sensei a chance to steal them from him. Or maybe he delivered them to him on a silver platter.

"You stopped writing." He said firmly, not wanting to admit that he failed her that night, at least not in front of Kakashi.

"I didn't wait for you." Sakura said firmly and blamelessly in her voice. "I didn't jump into Kakashi's arms as soon you leave me. I want you to know that I have been faithful to you and to what we had until the moment you left." She wanted him to know she respected him.

"That doesn't make it easier to bear." There was an obvious pain in the words he uttered, surprising Sakura and Kakashi.

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The love story of Kakashi and Sakura begins now. In some chapters there will be some changes of time, between the present (Kakashi and Sakura married) and past. I'll try to make everything as clear as possible.


	8. Moving on

Sakura looked at the two-year-old daughter and sighed. "Sara-chan, Mommy's coming back tomorrow to get you." She whispered to the smiling little girl before handing her to the grandmother.

"Don't worry, my dear, let's take good care of her, solve what you need and she'll be waiting for you tomorrow." Mebuki said in a sweet tone before grabbing the granddaughter in her arms and leading the child into the house, completely unaware of the internal conflict her daughter was experiencing at that moment.

Sakura smiled slightly at her mother before leaving and walking to the house she could no longer call her own. She opened the door and left the sandals in the entrance, feeling a certain melancholy knowing that this was the last time she would do it in that place where she had called home for two years. She shook the head, trying to get rid of the melancholy thoughts.

It was Friday afternoon and she decided she would take all of her and Sarada's things from the house Sasuke had bought, until the end of that night. With a nod to herself and renewed determination, she rolled up the sleeves of the light-green sweater and tied the hair in a tight ponytail, ready for a change both physically and emotionally. She would tear Sasuke from inside her once and for all and close the door behind him, locking her wounded heart so no man could step on it again. She had enough of men who left her behind for a lifetime.

* * *

"I could offer some help..." The lazy voice she knew very well, made her jump and curse herself for not paying attention to the surroundings.

_'What a great kunoichi I am.'_  She thought bitterly with a sour humor. Wiping her hands on the black shorts, she stared at the visitor and almost growled as her heart skipped a beat as she looked at him. She hated still feeling that nice cold in her stomach every time he was around. "Are you offering help?" She asked a little more rudely than she intended, but she did not bother to look regretful.

Kakashi approached her and almost smiled as she took an unconscious step back. He loved to see that he still had some effect on her, even though in the back of his mind a small voice still held some morale, screamed that he was a bastard for coveting the girlfriend of one of his former students. "Shikamaru took your place in the office today and told me you were moving." He raised an eyebrow at a silent question as he gestured with his hand to all the objects scattered outside the house where she had lived with Sasuke since they returning to Konoha.

"Then you came here of curiosity rather than the desire to help." She sneered and turned her back to him, ignoring him completely, realizing that he was not willing to help, not that this surprised her.  _'Lazy bastard.'_ She lifted an obviously heavy wooden dresser and placed it on a scroll open on the floor, making some hand signals before the furniture disappeared inside the storage scroll.

"I don't think you need much help." He responded with indifference seeing her doing everything without any difficulty, compared to him she was a thousand times stronger and much younger too, he thought belatedly. Still he took some objects and placed them on the scroll, storing them with some hand signals.

"So..." He murmured after a few minutes of a disturbing silence. "Are you moving?" He asked really curious about what it was all about.

Sakura sighed and turned to face him. She could very well communicate him about her new decision, after all they were still friends. "Sasuke is gone." She regretted it shortly after saying that phrase that left a bitter taste in her mouth.

Kakashi looked at her with a confused expression. "A mission." He filled it out, not understanding what she meant. Sasuke barely spent two months in Konoha when they returned from the one-year mission, and soon after that he left, mission after mission, staying only a day or two, before leaving again.

Sakura sat in a box and looked at him with a tired, almost defeated expression that made his heart squeeze painfully. "I broke up with him... with that." She pointed the house behind them. "I asked him to stay or I wouldn't be here if he came back and he chose to leave." She looked at the floor.

Kakashi felt as if the floor had opened beneath his feet. He remembered everything he did to make Sakura and Sasuke have a chance to have a happy family, a life together and now it seemed like everything was for nothing and the pain in his chest increased with that thought. "Wait." He took two steps closer to her. "You threatened him?"

Sakura snorted. "I'm not Naruto." She said a little offended. "We had an argument, I asked him to stay, he chose to leave." She sighed and ran a hand over her face. "It's not like we're married anyway and maybe he'll not come back." She looked down again. "I think he may have felt relieved by my suggestion..." She laughed without emotion. "Maybe I had suffocated him, I don't know. Maybe my proposal was what he had wanted for a long time..." She stopped mumbling as she felt Kakashi's hands around her face.

He forced her to look him in the eyes. "I'm so sorry." He whispered and she knew he was sorry for leaving her all those years ago, for having pushed her into the arms of a man who had never valued her as he thought she deserved to be valued, she knew he really sorry to see her in that state and somewhere in his mind he blamed himself.

She also blamed him the night Sasuke left, she thought that if he had not pushed her this could be their home, theirs life, with their children, but when she remembered Sarada all the thoughts were discarded because if there was one thing of which she would never repent, was Sarada. "Don't feel." She took his hands from her face. "It wasn't your fault. I'm a big girl and responsible for my own choices."

Kakashi found himself speechless. He wanted to say that he had given her no choice at that time, that all he did was push her to Sasuke until she had no choice but he decided not to reopen old wounds. "Where are you going?" He asked trying to ease the tension that had formed around them.

Sakura who had lifting up and was sealing the last boxes on the scroll, sat down again in a box and looked ahead with wide eyes.

"You have nowhere to go?" Kakashi asked in disbelief.

Sakura blinked a few times realizing how that question was so ridiculous as it was true. She was so stunned and determined to leave Sasuke's house that at no point did she think she had nowhere to go after selling her own apartment years ago. "I'm so stupid." She whispered to herself.

She could not go back to her parents's house, it was completely out of the question. Her mother would torment her, every second of every day as she had said a million times that the Uchiha boy would hurt her in an irreparable way and she could not dispute, except that her mother would interfere with Sarada's education and try to poison the girl against her own father. Sakura loved her mother, but the woman had a tongue and a temper that Sakura was not willing to put up with and her father would always be on Mebuki's side.

She could pay for a small apartment, but the furniture purchase would have to wait, since all she had was Sarada's bed, two dressers, a sofa and a refrigerator. Every furniture, Sasuke had bought for them and she would take nothing from him with her. She wrote down the savings she still had after giving almost all the money from the apartment sale to her parents to rebuild the house that was lost after the war. With a defeated sigh she felt her eyes burning with tears she would not spill in front of Kakashi. "I'll find a way." She said weakly.

Kakashi knew that she had given most of her savings to the parents and she lived well with the hospital salary and what he paid her as an assistant only because she did not have to worry about rent, since the house was Sasuke's, but now that she would have to pay for a rent, food, Sarada's school and all the expenses a little child had, things would be financially difficult. "I have a place." He offered before he could think better.

Sakura looked at the man kneeling in front of her. She ignored how his warm hands were comfortably lying on her thighs to focus on what he had said. "Do you have?" She asked in a voice full of hope.

He nodded and she saw her eyes wrinkle, indicating that there was a smile beneath that mask. "It needs some repairs and cleaning, but it has furniture that you can use and you'll not have to worry about renting." He said with a smile in his voice.

Sakura sighed in relief and before she could stop herself, she threw her arms around him and pulled him into a tight hug. She buried the face in his neck as she felt his arms surround her waist. She missed that contact and for the first time in three years she did not feel guilty about being so close to him. Just felt right.

* * *

"Kakashi, just open it." She said with obvious impatience and clapped her foot frantically on the wooden floor of the porch in front of the old house. They stood in front of the door for almost ten minutes now and she was beginning to worry about his mental state.

He looked at her for a few seconds and handed the key to her, taking a step back. "You do this." He said trying to sound indifferent.

Sakura looked at the key to the door and then looked at him, uncertainly. "Talk to me." She asked sweetly and took his hand in hers, caressing with the thumb, knowing that that gesture would do the trick.

He cursed the way she could get it all out of him after all this time. They were no longer lovers, they were friends and yet he would do anything she asked even if she did not ask with words. "I haven't been here since I was fourteen."

Sakura's eyes widened and she looked at the old house. She realized for the first time that this was his childhood home, where his father had killed himself, where he spent the most difficult times of his life. Where every night he were haunted by nightmares about the death of his teammates, and she nearly beat herself for being so insensitive. She gripped his hand tightly and smiled sweetly. "Well, this will be my house now, so please Kakashi..." She opened the door and came in, pulling him with her. "Make yourself in home."

Kakashi closed the eyes tightly and took slow steps into the house and when he opened the eyes all he saw was a glow of green eyes and a beautiful pink. He felt her hands cupping his face and took all his willpower and control like a shinobi not to kiss her at that moment. Her smile undid all the knots that had formed in his stomach and when she released his face he looked around and felt only nostalgia, there was no hurt, pain or feelings of guilt. He sighed relieved and wondered when the effect she had on him would pass, if it ever would.

Sakura let go of his hand and walked across the room, opening all the windows, letting sunlight in. She walked to the kitchen and pulled out the dusty curtain. "I liked this kitchen." She smiled at him and pointed to a place where her fridge would fit perfectly.

Kakashi looked at her, leaning against the kitchen sink and imagined it with an apron, cooking for him and Sarada on a Sunday morning. Shaking the head to get rid of those treacherous thoughts, he walked down the hall and gestured for her to accompany him. For all he knew, Sasuke could come back next month and drag her home with him and Kakashi would not interfere with Sakura's life more than he had already done.

He showed the rooms that had furniture in perfect condition and Sakura asked why he had abandoned such a large and beautiful home without care for so long. He scratched the back of the neck and laughed nervously blaming his laziness and she knew there was more to it, she knew that the ghosts of the past that lived on the walls of that house haunted him and decided not to push the subject.

She would repair that house and Kakashi would have to see that place with new eyes at some point. She hated the way he allowed the past to hit him, she just wanted one day he could look ahead and take a new path. She left the pain of thinking that they could live in that house one day, together as a family, sink into the depths of her confused mind and erased those thoughts, deciding that she too should lay a stone on the past and move on. Sarada needed her now, and she needed to keep her feet on the ground.

* * *

The morning sun burst into the window and she covered the eyes and turned to hide her face in a broad, strong chest and froze as she realized there was someone beside her. "Tickles." Kakashi's husky voice made her open the eyes as the wind of his breath blew into her hair.

She took the hand that was apparently tickling his side and sat up, looking to him. "Good Morning." She smiled at his sleepy eyes and his gray, messy hair.

He sat up, cracking his back and moaned. "I'm too old for this." He grunted and sighed with relief as she placed a chakra-wrapped hand on his back to ease the pain. The sound of pleasure that he released made Sakura blush slightly and she nearly beat herself for being so silly around him.

She started cleaning the house the previous afternoon by the time he finished showing her the house. Even without her asking he rolled up his sleeves and helped her with the cleaning, when they emptied the last box with Sarada's things in what would be the new room of the girl, they realized that it was past ten o'clock at night. Sakura made dinner with the food she had brought from Sasuke's house, leaving nothing there. She almost jumped for joy when the old stove in Kakashi's house worked and she realized she would not have to buy a new stove any time soon.

They ate in the coffee table in the living room and they collapsed on the floor due to exhaustion. Sakura slept on Kakashi's wide chest as his back suffered for spending the night on the hard wooden floor with her weight on him.

When she finished relieving the pain in his back, she got up and went to the kitchen to prepare breakfast. "Thank you Kakashi." She said as she set a plate in front of him.

"Sakura, this is the hundredth time you thank me, please stop." He grunted and she lowered the eyes as she sat in front of him on the kitchen table, giving him privacy to eat without snooping under the mask.

"I just want you to know that I'm grateful." She insisted.

"I know, and I want you to know that you can count with me." He answered truthfully and she fought the wish to look up and face him.

She nodded, knowing he was looking to her even though she was not looking to him. Breakfast followed quietly and he left for the Hokage Tower as she went to her parents's house to fetch Sarada to bring her to the new house.

* * *

Sakura decided not to tell her parents that she had moved, it was not like they went to her house before, it was always her going to their house with Sarada. She knew they did not like Sasuke much, and although Kizashi was not vocal about it, the fact that he never talked about Sarada's father was enough for Sakura to understand her father's feelings about her boyfriend. She gave up on inviting her parents to the house she shared with Sasuke, after the fifth time they'd made a ridiculous and obviously false excuse, it was not as if Sasuke made a point of them coming, he never went to her parents's house either. Sarada was the one who suffered from the lack of contact between the father and the grandparents.

Sakura explained as best she could that Daddy had gone back on a mission and answered the questions about why he never stayed with them like the parents of the little friends in the nursery. This time Sakura did not say that Daddy would be back soon or tried to appease the anger and sadness of the two-year-old girl. She did not want to explain that her father chose to leave instead of stay with them, she did not want to hurt even more the little girl.

When they entered the new house that was completely clean and organized, Sarada forgot the subject about Sasuke and ran around curiously exploring what would be their home for an indeterminate time.

Sakura called for Yamato to repair the damage on the wooden floor and outside the house, he stayed for afternoon tea and she opened her heart to him while Sarada took a nap. He held her hand on the table and said it was the best decision she had ever made and he knew she would find someone who deserved her, soon. She did not comment on him talking about Kakashi much more than he used to and she realized that Yamato was far more insightful and observant than she thought he was. She was sure he knew about her relationship with Kakashi, that ended in a not too happy way three years ago.

Before leaving, he remade the garden in the back of the house and cleaned the lawn of the entrance with the use of water and earth elements. He fixed the fence that surrounded the front of the house and made a high wooden wall in the back garden for safety, since the place was a little far from the center of the city. Sakura decided not to argue with him that no one was foolish enough to try to break into a house she lived in, but she was grateful for his concern.

That night, Kakashi appeared. Sakura made dinner and they ate together. He took Sarada to bed when she fell on his lap, exhausted after playing with the ninken he summoned to distract the little girl. Sakura showed all the changes in the house and when she opened a sliding door revealing a room that Kakashi swore to himself that he would never enter again, he gasped. One more time his heart clenched as he realized how much he loved that woman.


	9. Refuge

Kakashi left the Hokage Tower earlier that Saturday night. He heard from Tenzou that Sakura had asked for his help to repair the house where she was living and Kakashi did his best to dodge all the questions Tenzou had asked. He knew his friend knew he had something with Sakura in the past, but he would be damned if he confirmed or denied anything. Using his best evasive skills, he ran away from the conversation and literally ran towards the house where Sakura and Sarada were.

He knocked and walked in, knowing she would not would care with the invasion. He was greeted by the delicious scent of Sakura's home-cooked food, she invited him to dinner and he did not even bother to look shy. Dinner was even better than the smell and after the food, Sarada toyed with Pakkun and rode on Bull, pretending the poor dog was a pony. Kakashi remembered all the times that he wanted that girl to be his, and for the first time the thought did not come loaded with guilt. If Sasuke decided leave these two amazing girls behind, he could not blame Kakashi for at least taking care of them.

When he put Sarada's sleepy body on the bed, Sakura poured tea and they talked about their day, taking Kakashi to memories of a few years ago when that sort of thing between them was a comfortable routine. He pushed the feeling of regret as deep as he could, deciding to take advantage of what was being offered now and forgetting what he had thrown away in the past.

Sakura took him on a tour of the house, showing all the renovations and changes Tenzou had made. He was glad that the house was being cared for, but he felt a pang of jealousy that he was not the one to sort everything out for her. When Sakura opened a door he swore to himself that it would never open his heart sank. "I took the liberty of..." She said weakly and pulled him by the hand, showing the new room.

The carpet that was stained with his father's blood was replaced with a new wooden floor. He looked at the corner of the main wall and saw three small cabinets. Sakura opened the middle one, revealing a photo of Hatake Sakumo and another of his mother, whom he did not even remember existed. "I found a box in one of the rooms. It had some old photos." She explained in the same low voice, as if afraid of his reaction.

He walked to the cabinets and opened the other two, the one on the right had the photo of Minato and the one on the left had a picture of Obito and Rin, smiling at each other. Kakashi did not even remember having this picture but he thought Obito looked so happy that it made his heart jump faster in the chest. He noticed that there was incense holder and a flower vase next to each frame. "You-"

"I crossed the line." Sakura said with a startled look as if it were a child caught doing something wrong. Before she could fall into a whirlwind of guilt, Kakashi took her by the shoulders and brought her close to him. He looked into the wide green eyes and all he wanted to say was that he loved her and that she was the best thing that ever happened to him and that she had erased such a painful part of that house that he could kiss her, but instead he buried the nose in her hair and stroked her head.

"Kakashi." She whispered and after a few seconds she released the death grip he had on her shoulders and pulled him into a hug. "I asked Yamato to disappear with the blood stains. I wanted this room to be something good instead of something painful for you."

"It looks great." He managed to whisper back.  _'You're great.'_  He added to himself.

* * *

"It does not seem that this was once a abandoned mausoleum." Ino said in a voice full of sarcasm.

Sakura laughed and tried not to choke as she drank from the glass with wine her friend had served. "You don't even know how this house was before, little fool."

Ino smiled at her friend on the sofa. "I'm speculating." She took a sip of the wine and made a face that made Sakura laugh even more. "You said that Kakashi left the place for years." Ino sighed. "I still don't like the fact that you live in his old house, it gives me the feeling that you owe him something." She tapped the chin thoughtfully with the hand that was not holding the glass. "How long have you living here? Six months? Are you really looking for another place?"

Sakura answered with her own sigh. "Kakashi will not charge me for this, Ino." She saw her friend's blonde eyebrow rise and slapped her arm. "He'll not charge any kind of payment." Sakura emphasized this part, knowing how Ino's creative mind worked. "It's been almost eight months since we've lived here and I'm not looking for a place yet." She clarified. "I'll wait a year. Repetitive changes are not good for Sara-chan."

Ino nodded, having a little child almost Sarada's age, she knew how changes in general affected young children. "You're right, but please promise me." She paused, holding Sakura's hand to emphasize the words. "Don't get involved with him again. Kakashi pushed you into Sasuke's arms and looks where you are now."

Despite the harsh words, Sakura knew that Ino did not want to hurt her. "Kakashi is my friend Ino." She answered, taking the hand away from her friend's grip. "Our involvement is purely friendly." She desperately wanted to change the subject.

"Right." She said sceptically. "The fact that he dines here almost every night and walks the village with Sara-chan all the time like a protective father is really very friendly on his part."

"I know you care about me and Sarada, but Kakashi is a good friend, really... And even if you hold a grudge against him for what happened in the past, he's still my friend and I trust him." Sakura said sincerely.

"You're always so understanding and compassionate Sakura." Ino said in a voice that said plainly that was not a compliment.

"I'm beginning to hate those words." Sakura snapped as she took a larger sip than she should have.

"Sasuke is a fool to leave you behind and I'm pretty sure he's going to show up in a few years with the certainty that you're waiting for him." Ino said irritably and Sakura knew that regardless of Ino's feelings against Kakashi, what she felt for Sasuke now was almost total dislike.

"Just believe me when I tell you that I'll never allow Sasuke to affect me negatively, never more." Sakura took her hand this time.

Ino nodded. "We grew up, did not we, _Forehead_?" She said with a laugh.

"I guess so,  _Ino-Pig_." She laughed back, grateful to have Ino as best friend even after all these years.

* * *

After Ino's departure after a much-needed girl's night, Sakura switched off the lights and up the stairs to the second floor. She found Sarada sleeping peacefully, before firmly squeezing the remaining wine bottle and walking to her room. She opened the window, pulling out a small single futon as she climbed onto the roof for another lonely night.

After Sasuke's departure and the change of the house she shared with him, Sakura realized that the nights made her feel very lonely. She's endured everything the past few years the best she can, with a smile on her face. The abrupt separation with Kakashi, the absence of Sasuke after their return to Konoha and now the fact that he chose to leave her and Sarada behind without any remorse. She sank into work and free time was occupied with Sarada, but the fact that Kakashi was always around made her feel sad and happy at the same time.

She loved his company and after a few months with him visiting her and Sarada very often, she became accustomed to his presence, and even though it made her feel happy because she loved him more than she wanted to admit to herself, she still feel sad and empty whenever he left when night fell. She took a large swallow from the bottle and refused to recognize the tears streaming down her cheeks. _'I'm pathetic.'_

Sakura was torn from her thoughts when she heard footsteps inside the room. "Mom." Sarada's sleepy voice called to her and she tripped over her own feet as she stepped out of the roof and jumped in the bedroom window again.

"What was that, dear?" She felt even more pathetic as she hugged her daughter as she kept the mouth away from the girl's nose so she did not have to smell alcohol.

"Bad dream." Sarada said while she rubbed the eyes. "I want Daddy." She whimpered and Sakura felt her heart ache.

"Daddy is far away, Sara-chan." She said weakly as she took the girl in the lap and carried her to the bed.

"Kakashi?" Sarada asked sleepily as she laid the head on the pillow.

Sakura felt the eyes burn with tears she did not want to shed in front Sarada. She thought that in another life, Sarada could be Kakashi's daughter and she understood the girl's attachment to the masked man, it was justifiable that if her father was away she would call for the second father figure she knew and Sakura admitted to herself that Ino was right, Kakashi was too close to them and that had to end because it would not get them anywhere.

"Kakashi is not Sara-chan's dad, right?!" She pulled Sarada to lie on top of her and hugged the daugther, tightly. "But mom will always be here, always, no matter what."

"Always." Sarada whispered before falling asleep again.

* * *

Kakashi held Sarada's hand firmly as he walked toward the nursery. He had become accustomed to the routine of picking her to take her at the nursery while Sakura hurried to the hospital. He did not mind being late at the Hokage Tower every day, but he knew Sakura hated being late for work. "Did you sleep well?" He asked sweetly.

"No." She said with her cheeks stowed in obvious annoyance. "I had a nightmare."

Kakashi caressed her head in a comforting gesture. "Your mama took care of it, I'm sure."

"Mom was on the roof again." Sarada said nonchalantly. "But she hugged me and sent the nightmares away." She said with a smile.

Kakashi returned the smile knowing that Sakura was a great mother and no nightmare or anything else would hurt Sarada, but he wondered what Sarada meant when he stated that Sakura was on the roof and apparently not for the first time. Before he could ask about it, they arrived in front of the nursery and Sarada was snatched in the teacher's arms, leaving Kakashi in his own thoughts.

* * *

It was the seventh time he had been perched on the high tree near the house where he had lived during his youth. He knew that he looked like a stalker from the point of view of anyone who looked at that scene, he thanked that the house was located in an isolated place.

After Sarada had innocently let slip that Sakura had a habit of going to the house's roof during the night when Sarada probably should be asleep. He discovered that from the right position of a tall tree near the house, which he remembered his father having planted years ago, he could have a clear view of the room window that Sakura was currently occupying.

After a week of staying in that tree shortly after leaving Sakura's home, after dinner, he discovered that she had an unhealthy habit of laying on a futon on the roof with some drink in the hand. He blamed Tsunade for being a bad influence on her, but that was just him trying to put the blame on someone other than himself.

After all these interesting discoveries he found himself sitting on the tree, staring at her as she stared up at the sky. He was thankful that the saké bottle had been discarded for some time. He did not know why he was there and he had no intention of making his presence known to her, but when he heard a strangled sob come out of her throat, he knew he could only hear from that distance thanks to the lineage of Hatake clan, he raised unconsciously.

Before he could stop his own feet, Kakashi jumped through the smaller trees and landed on the roof beside her. "Kakashi?" He heard Sakura's exasperated shout and watched as her eyes widened with obvious surprise and he realized that he would never tire of looking at those green eyes.

"Yo." He lifted a hand in greeting as he sat beside her on the futon.

"Did you forget something?" She asked in obviously embarrassed voice as she wiped the wet cheeks with the sleeve of sweater.

He shook the head and moved closer to her, lying on the futon and looking up at the sky as she had been doing before. "Kakashi." He heard her grunt, but he ignored her and sighed contentedly as she lay beside him after a few minutes of silence.

"Why you stay here?" He asked after a while.

She turned her face to the side, hiding the features. "Were you watching me?" She asked cautiously. "If the answer is yes, that's scary." She tried to sound humorous but her voice was still choked, although she did not know if it was the fault of the sakê or the previous cry.

Kakashi laughed deeply trying to disguise how much that statement was exactly what he was thinking of himself. "I was just a little... worried about you." He cupped her face gently forcing her to look at him. He felt the heart clench painfully when he saw the red eyes from the crying. "Sakura." He said in a voice loaded with gentleness and perhaps a twinge of guilt, but he was too tired to analyze the feeling.

Sakura stared at him but refused to say anything, she felt ridiculous for being caught crying on the roof of a borrowed house and she felt like a child again with the look he was giving her. All she wanted was to curl in a ball and let herself be consumed by the loneliness as she had been doing in the last few months. "You couldn't leave me alone, could you?" She said with an angry tone. "What are you doing here anyway?" She said in a neutral tone, realizing that being defensive was the best option.

Kakashi knew what she was doing, he was very well aware that it was more comfortable for her to put barriers around her than to open to him. He knew this defense mechanism very well, he had created it long before she thought of using it. "Sarada let slip that her beautiful mother might have a weird little habit of taking refuge on the roof." He said with the same lazy tone as always, not letting any emotion pass. "I decided I could pay a visit."

"How long have you been watching me, Kakashi?" Sakura asked bluntly.

Kakashi sighed and ran a hand over his face. "You're very perceptive." He replied, diverting her question.

Sakura sat abruptly. "You can leave, I'm going to bed." She entered the room before he could say anything.

* * *

Sakura took off the sweater, only wearing a thin T-shirt and froze before taking off the pants when she heard the window opening and closing behind her. "I thought we were friends." Kakashi's hoarse, almost disappointed voice echoed behind her.

"We are." She said dryly. "But there are things I can't tell you." She laid on the bed, too tired for the conversation.

Sakura closed the eyes tightly as she felt the mattress sink down beside her. "Close your eyes and pretend I'm not here." She heard him say it low in her ear and laughed dryly murmuring that he was being ridiculous. "Just do it, Sakura." She heard him say it with an imperative voice she had not heard for a long time and sighed in defeat, deciding that if she said something foolish that would hurt both, it was entirely his fault and perhaps the saké she had ingested and refused to burn from her system using chakra.

"I feel lonely when Kakashi leaves, after we finish dinner and put Sarada in bed." She felt a lump forming in her throat and squeezed the sheet tight. "I hate myself for not missing Sasuke as I know I should after almost three years together. I hate myself for blaming him for it, since he spent most of those years away." She sighed. "So I lay on that futon in the roof telling myself how pathetic I am for not being able to keep someone by my side and wondering if I'm that bad because... because they both left me."

Kakashi saw a tear fall into the corner of her eye but before he could do anything, she continued. "And when I heard the elders chattering about the arranged marriage of the Rokudaime, I felt even more pathetic. Kumogakure's dymaio daughter is certainly more appropriate than a single medic-nin with a daughter who lives in his old house." She laughed through sobs. "It's okay, because I'm fine." She sobbed. "I love Sarada and Sasuke is better without me wherever he is and Kakashi will surely be happy with that noble and beautiful woman who doesn't have another man's daughter as extra luggage-" She stopped talking when she felt the Kakashi's strong arms pulling her into a hug.

"I loved you." She said through sobs as she gripped his green vest tightly. "I still love you." She cried even more. "And I know it doesn't matter anymore because I screwed up."

"Sakura." Kakashi tried to pull away to look at her, but she did not let go. He stroked her hair and thanked her for not looking at him because he was not the kind to open his heart, but he knew what he was going to say could change everything between them and he would lose the courage if she look into his eyes. Then he pressed her head against his chest to keep her there. "I loved you. I found out that night that I left you at the bar." He kissed the top of her head. "Forgive me for deciding everything without asking what you wanted. I'm sorry for leaving you and I regret it every day since you left." He felt his own eyes burn. "I take care of Sarada as if she were mine because I wanted her to be. I want her to be."

Sakura stepped away from his grasp and stared at him in astonishment and Kakashi cursed the strength that woman had. She looked into the red eyes with the unshed tears he had and was surprised at how much emotion she found there. "You mean this?" She asked uncertainly.

Kakashi pulled her again, unable to look directly at her and was pleased when she relaxed into his embrace. "I still love you, Sakura."

He heard her gasp and felt her arms clenching him almost painfully. "I love you so much, Kakashi." He heard her muffled voice say. "But I feel awful." She sniffed. "I loved Sasuke for so long and I just did not try hard enough because I was stuck in loving you and I never stopped loving you but I tried to love him and be a good girlfriend to him because-"

"Shh." He stroked her hair. He understood what she meant, knowing Sakura, he knew that after sleeping with Sasuke she tried to forget everything about him and move on with Sasuke, but he was surprised to learn that she had not stopped loving him all this time, even though she being in a relationship with Sasuke. He knew she probably blamed herself for it but he did not care, he knew that Sakura had given all she could and could not to make Sasuke happy, it was not her fault that he chose not to be around. "Shh." He held her tightly, wanting those thoughts to leave her mind forever.

"Are not you going to marry Dymio's daughter?" He heard her muffled voice ask after she calmed down.

Kakashi chuckled. "I'll not." He moved away a little to look into her eyes. "Did you really think I'd hear what those elders say?"

Sakura opened her mouth and closed it, deciding not to answer a rhetorical question. "You love me?" She asked biting the lower lip.

Kakashi nodded and she knew he would not vocalize again while she was looking at him, but that gesture was enough and she smiled genuinely, happy to know that he loved her back, after so much waiting time. "I love you, Kakashi." She said sincerely and felt his covered lips resting on her lips. She moaned unconsciously at the unexpected touch and closed the eyes, lowering the mask to kiss him completely.

Kakashi ignored the taste of saké and concentrated on the softness of her lips and how he missed her in last years. When the kiss ended, leaving them both out of breath he kicked off his sandals and the vest, resting on the bed, pulling her to lay on his chest. "Good night, Sakura." He said as he pulled the mask back.

"We have to talk about this, you know." She tried to argue.

"There's not much to say. You're mine now, I'm not giving you up anymore, and that's it." He said arrogantly.

Sakura snorted. "You know our relationship is a lot more complicated than that, Hokage-sama." She mocked.

"Oh?" He said innocently. "Just because I'm the Hokage and you're my ex-student and current assistant, the mother of my ex-student's daughter and a lot younger than me?" He asked in a lazy tone. "Details, my beautiful cherry blossom."

"Sometimes I hate you." Sakura grunted sleepily.

Kakashi turned off the lamp on the bedside table. "But the times you love me make up for the times you hate me." He smiled when he felt her calm breathing warm his skin, meaning she had fallen asleep. He kissed her head before closing his eyes and following her into the dream world, no matter what problems that relationship would bring, he would deal with it tomorrow.

* * *


	10. Starting Over

Kakashi left the bathroom wearing the same clothes he had worn the day before, walking lazily toward the kitchen while wiping the hair with a soft towel he found in Sakura's bathroom. "I wonder why you never comb your hair." Sakura's amused voice graced him the moment he entered the kitchen.

"Kashi." Sarada greeted him, with the mouth full of food and he could not contain the smile that adorned his lips beneath the mask as he stroked her hair.

"You take care of it." Sakura pointed to the table with food. "And that." She pointed with a thumb over her shoulder and he knew she was talking about the sink with dishes. "I hate to be late." She kissed Sarada on the forehead and kissed his cheek over the mask and before he could say anything she disappeared, leaving flower petals that disappeared soon after as well.

"She should enjoy life more." Kakashi said looking at the beautiful three-year-old girl who nodded cheerfully and he knew she understood nothing of what he meant. "We're both going to eat lazily, play a little and I'll leave you in the nursery five minutes before the gates close."

When she nodded again and smiled happily with her mouth full, Kakashi held out a hand to her, where she rapped cheerfully. "That's right, we both know how to live, Sara-chan, we need to teach Mommy soon."

"Hai." Sarada nodded, knowing that if Kakashi said something, was true and she just nodded.

* * *

Sakura finished filling in the inpatient files and walked toward her office, freezing with the hand on the door handle as she felt a chakra signature inside the room. She opened the door slowly. "Hey." She greeted with a smile. "What brings you here?" She asked genuinely curious.

"A date." She heard the beautiful blond woman say and narrowed the eyes, knowing that she would not like what would come next. "I got you a date tonight." Ino smiled happily. "Am I the best friend you could ask, yes or for sure?"

Sakura walked over to the table and placed the briefcases on it, taking a deep breath before thinking of something useful to say. "Today is Wednesday." She decided to follow the most obvious way.

"And?" Ino snapped. "He is shinobi, Jounin, handsome and intelligent." She sat in the chair in front of Sakura's desk. "He works on Intelligence with me. You'll like him. When I told him about you he was in the clouds."

"Ino." Sakura bit the lip nervously, knowing that what she was going to say would trigger the Fifth Shinobi War. "I can't go on a date today." She stated, hoping to be vague enough to discourage her friend matchmaker.

"I'll take care of Sarada for you." Ino declared with conviction. "And Kakashi can make his own dinner." She said with a bit of obvious irritation in the voice, narrowing her eyes at Sakura as if she was crazy for feeding the man every day.

When Sakura did not say anything for a few minutes and Ino saw the gears on her pink head spinning around, she knew exactly what was happening and she tried to keep her temper in check. She loved Sakura but over the years she realized that her friend had an almost cruel tendency to choose wrong paths in love. "Tell me nothing happened between you." She begged.

"It's not like we planned-" Ino heard Sakura mutter but decided she did not want to hear the things she had to say. She remembered how Sakura had entered the flower shop years ago saying that she would be leaving with Sasuke on a mission for a year and Ino was completely confused about it because she thought Sakura was involved with an old friend who might as well be Kankuro or Shino, but she was only speculating. When she questioned about the mysterious man and Sakura started to cry about how she had been pushed and because of that drank into oblivion and sleeping with Sasuke even thinking of this other man, Ino felt all the pain of her best friend.

She heard Sakura say details about the relationship that had been abruptly ended and seemingly against Sakura's will. She listened intently and turned on the points a little later, and even though Sakura had not said the name, Ino found out who the mysterious man was. When Sakura left, she thought about the conversation all day and when night fell she hurried toward the Hokage's apartment to give him a talk about how he was a bastard for breaking the heart of the only woman who was worth in his life. Even if she could be executed the next day, all she wanted was for him to know he did not deserve Sakura.

That's why she decided she would not participate if Sakura decided to choose that path again. She did not want to see Sakura hurt again, much less with Sarada included in the sum, and soon after that Sasuke left them. "I don't want to hear." Ino interrupted, rising from the chair and staring at Sakura seriously. "I love you, you know I do." She tossed her hair over the shoulder. "But I don't approve, not after what he has done to you." She said seriously and walked to the door. "You don't need my approval for anything anyway." She left, ignoring the desperate way Sakura called her name.

"Good luck, Sakura." She whispered to herself as she left the hospital to tell the handsome boy his date had given up.

* * *

Sakura took off the sandals and walked into the house silently, walking toward the kitchen from where she was listening to Sarada's laughter. She smiled unconsciously, seeing the two people she loved most, grateful for relief after a terrible day. "I'm at home." She stated while walking until the little girl sat in a high chair.

"Welcome back." Kakashi's husky voice spoke too close to her ear, sending shivers down her skin.

She turned the face to face him and saw that he was wearing an apron and realized that a delicious smell was permeating the air. She walked to the stove and opened the pan lid. "It's been so long since I eat your food." She said with a nostalgic tone and a smile on face, happy to not have to cook after a tiring day.

Kakashi walked over to her and hugged her from behind, becoming surprised when she turned and buried the face in his chest. "Sakura?" He asked a little uncertainly.

"I'm fine." She said with a little smile as she pulled away from him. "Thank you for taking Sarada in the nursery again." She pointed to the stove. "And for making dinner."

"What happened?" He insisted, knowing something was upsetting her, but she would not talk about it unless he pushed enough. He took her hand and made her sit in the chair in front of Sarada. "You can tell me." He sat down beside her, not letting go of her hand, hoping the gesture was enough.

"I guess ..." She sighed and pushed back the tears, deciding not to ruin their night. "I don't think people will approve our relationship easily."

Kakashi blinked a few times and thought of the people he really cared about, whether they would approve or not, which were not many anyway. Naruto would be shocked for sure, he would probably throw a tantrum and ask a thousand questions in addition to talking about Sasuke more than Kakashi would be willing to listen. Tenzo would approve of that, Kakashi was sure. Gai would be ecstatic to know that he had finally found love and would live through the best spring years of youth with the most beautiful flower that graced the Konoha garden. Iruka and Genma would ask indecent questions, sneakily, but they would be happy for him. Kakashi did not give a shit about the rest of the people besides them, Sarada and of course, Sakura's parents that he would eventually have to conquer.

"Does that bother you?" He asked after his brief reflection.

She looked at him and after a few seconds and intense scrutiny, she smiled. The most brilliant and beatiful smile that made Kakashi out of breath for a brief moment. She shook the head in denial and cupped his face affectionately. "If I have you." She held Sarada's hand with the hand that was not clutching his face. "I'll be happy."

He smiled and took the other hand of Sarada, who looked at them curiously. "I promise I'm not going anywhere." He kissed Sarada's hand that smiled at him, so he kissed Sakura on the lips briefly when Sarada was not looking. "Not without you two." He added.

Sakura laughed genuinely, completely losing the dismay that had taken hold of her after Ino left. "People will accept over time." She declared to herself and got up from the table, serving the dinner while Kakashi played with Sarada.

She looked at the distracted pair and felt her heart warm. She thought of what Ino had said and knew that most of her close friends would do the same, not knowing what Ino knew about the past. The difference in age, Sarada, Sasuke, Kakashi's position, any of these things, or all of them, would be reasons for judgment and she decided she would not mind, because she wanted it, she wanted a chance to be happy. Sarada and kakashi also deserved it and she would do the impossible to give them, a family.

* * *

"I don't think she would have the guts." Sakura stopped before entering the Hospital Cafeteria when she heard the voices of some nurses. She remembered Tsunade telling her to always be sneaky and take those moments to find out what was going on in the hospital and maybe in the village, so she decided to stop and listen to the gossip of the day.

"I heard her daughter's father left her because he found out about the affair." Another voice added.

"How horrible." One of the nurses Sakura recognized the voice, exclaimed in perplexity.

"What I heard was that he left her and only then did she start meeting the other."

"But he's a lot older." A voice that Sakura recognized as a medic-nin she had trained, declared. "He's the Hokage and he was her teacher, was not he?"

Sakura felt her heart skip a beat faster and she leaned against the wall. She imagined the gossip would start sometime. It had been two months since the relationship with Kakashi became serious again. They both decided not to tell anyone, because the unpleasant repercussions, mainly because of Sarada. His visits became much more frequent and he rarely slept in his apartment, meaning that the ANBU and shinobi who came to deliver scrolls and call him to the Hokage Tower saw where he was most of the time and it was obvious that in some time, one of them would spread the rumor.

"Is he the real father of her daughter?" Sakura decided it was time to make her presence known, there was only a little that her temper could tolerate.

She walked to the Cafeteria with her head up, completely ignoring the glances that turned to her. She smiled politely at everyone who crossed her path, as usual, and stared at the particular group that was talking about her earlier, while she grabbed a sandwich and a cup of coffee. She took one last look with narrowed eyes, deciding that it would be best to let them know that she had heard every word, before leaving the Cafeteria leaving some employees trembling and frightened behind.

* * *

"Bull is tired today, Sara-chan." Kakashi said with a serious tone, but he laughed at the adorable pout she gave him after that statement.

"So I want to see." Sarada said with a giggle as she stood before him.

"See what?" Sakura asked curiously as she watched their interaction.

"Okay, but this is going to be your birthday gift." Kakashi answered Sarada with a smile, remembering that she would be four years old the following week.

"Yeah." Sarada clapped the hands.

"What are you talking abo-" Sakura stopped talking and was completely puzzled to see Sarada's little hands pull Kakashi's mask down in a quick gesture. She kept the eyes wide, staring at the scene before her and almost laughed at Sarada's frustrated face when another mask appeared beneath the first. "He'll never let you see what's under-" She found herself speechless once more as the second mask disappeared, exposing Kakashi's face.

"Mommy, I saw." Sarada looked between Kakashi and Sakura and laughed happily. "See, Mom. There's a face under the mask."

Sakura blinked a few times and nodded to the euphoric little girl. "Sakura, you're drooling." Kakashi's amused voice brought her back to reality. "I'm not." She screamed indignantly and ran a hand over her chin to check, making Kakashi laugh out loud. She put a hand on her chest to calm the beats. Seeing him laughing was almost surreal. When he stopped laughing and kept smiling, she sighed, beautiful sharp canines and white teeth, formed a beautiful smile.

He crawled slowly down the carpet until he was in front of her, while Sarada decided that his face without the mask was no more interesting than the riding toy she was playing with now. "Yo." He said in a low voice as he hovered over a petrified Sakura.

Sakura reached out unconsciously, running her fingers over the features of his face that was too close. "Hey." She whispered weakly, staring. "It's a great birthday gift." She said in a low voice after a few seconds examining every inch of his face. Without trying to resist, she ran the thumb over his full lower lip, making him sigh at the touch. "Why now?" She asked in a whisper.

He shrugged trying to seem casual, when in fact he was trying to control his heartbeat by having her so close to him. Looking at Sarada and then at Sakura again, he sighed. "I don't want to hide from you both." He stroked her cheek. "I don't want there to be secrets between us." He said weakly and Sakura knew he was trying very hard to be so honest with her at that moment.

"I'm happy." She said with a sincere smile. Kissing him quickly while Sarada was distracted, making him smile to her.

* * *

Sakura left the bathroom, closing the door behind her and looked at the bed where Kakashi was lying with both arms behind the head, shirtless and for the first time, unmasked. Walking to him, she sat on the bed and placed a hand on his chest as he sat up to bring the body closer to hers. When his warm, uncovered lips met hers, she closed the eyes and enjoyed the sensation of having him.

They separate to breathe and she ran the fingers over his face, admiring once more what she had been deprived of seeing for so many years. "I guess I'll never get tired of looking at you." She said with a silly grin.

"That's good, because I'm not going anywhere, Sakura." He said in a hoarse voice and in a lower tone than it usually was. He pushed her slowly over the mattress and looked at her affectionately.

Sakura recognized that look, was hungry and demanding. That dark look made her feel warm and wanted and she decided it was time to take a step in their relationship. Since he decided to show his face to her, she would give everything from her to him in return. "Kakashi." She whispered as she allowed her fingers to run through his abdomen. "I want you."

Kakashi closed the eyes tightly and felt his own breathing become more breathless. He has not had many women in his life since he always kept a barrier around himself, unwilling to maintain serious relationships. The few women he had were to meet fleeting needs, and none of them were from Konoha and they did not see his face. At that moment he felt completely exposed, physically and emotionally, but he did not feel fear, instead he felt a pleasant yearning for the anticipation.

He placed his forehead over hers and slid the thin strap of the black nightdress she wore, kissing her shoulder as the strap slid through the creamy skin. "I want you so badly." He said earnestly in a voice laden with desire, remembering that he had waited for it for years. "I didn't touch another woman after you." He stated wanting with all his strength that she knew there would never be another after her, as he spread open-mouthed kisses down her collarbone, descending further and further.

Sakura sighed and smiled unconsciously at that statement, sliding her fingertips down his scalp, satisfied as he groaned. "Kakashi." She whispered almost breathless and closed the eyes as she felt her skin burning in every place he touched.

Kakashi suppressed a grunt when he heard her make sounds that sounded like the most beautiful melody, echoing through the room, dimly lit by lamp on bedside table. With each kiss and touch, she squirmed under him and all he wanted was to make her feel more, until all she could see and want was him. Cleverly pulling off the last piece of offensive clothing that was in the way of what he wanted to do with her, Kakashi positioned himself over her and looked into her eyes. "I wasn't your first." He whispered over her lips as he placed his forehead over hers. "I regret it bitterly." He said with a pang of pain in his almost desperate tone. "But I'll be your last, Sakura." He stated with conviction.

She nodded as she stared into those dark eyes replete of emotions, but there was something there that she could not immediately identify. She saw fire, desire and a little regret for the past, shining in his eyes and she felt trapped, almost hypnotized, as if caught in a genjutsu, impossible to break free and she discovered that she did not want such freedom, she wanted to stay captive in that gaze for all eternity. "You're mine, Sakura." She heard his husky voice whisper in her ear as he bound their bodies together so slowly it was almost torturous. She discovered at that moment that the last thing in his eyes, the only thing she could not identify, was love.

"Kakashi." She stammered as she felt every muscle in his back on the palms of her hands. "I love you." She managed to catch her breath long enough to say how she felt at that moment. "You're the only one I want." She said in muffled whispers and moans almost supplicants. "Always been you." She grunted as she felt his sharp teeth biting the skin of her neck in an almost painful way and she had to quell the urge to ask for more. "Always will be you."

Kakashi took one last kiss on her neck, ignoring her protest groan. Taking her face in one hand while his other hand was supportive his body would not fall on her, he looked into her eyes and got lost in that green that always called him. He remembered all the times that she had saved him, physically and emotionally, and for the first time in his life he felt complete. Sealing their lips together, he swallowed every sound she uttered, wanting more than anything that moment never to end. He would love her every day as long as he was allowed to.

_The End._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's not the end, I was joking. There are still a few chapters ahead.


	11. Daddy

 

Sakura said goodbye to her parents with a tight hug and went back into the kitchen to take the plates with leftover cake from the table. She smiled toward the living room where the children played on the big rug on the floor with a few adults around, spread out on the couches and armchairs. After the party was almost over and only the closest friends were around she realized that Sarada was more at ease than before when the house was full.

The four-year birthday party had been uneventful and Sakura was glad to see Sarada happy. She found very strange that Sarada did not even ask about Sasuke's absence, but she decided that she would not be the first to mention the name of the man.

"Dad." Sarada's sweet voice echoed through the house and Sakura felt the small porcelain dish slip between her fingers, scattering pieces of porcelain everywhere, the sound of shards on the wooden floor accompanied the happy shout of the girl who threw the arms around Kakashi as she called him so affectionately.

Sakura left the mess behind while walking toward the living room, the feet making little noise on the wooden floor, and she was feeling restless every second that passed, due to the absolute silence that invaded the house after the innocent declaration of Sarada. When she looked at the faces of her friends who were looking between Sarada, Kakashi and her, with surprised faces and arched eyebrows, she felt an involuntary sigh escaping her lips.

" _Dad_  is tired of being a horse, Sara-chan." Sakura stated, taking the happy girl off Kakashi's back who gave a grateful smile beneath the mask. They did a good job ignoring the stunned look that was now stamped on everyone's faces in the room, except Yamato and Sai. "Go play in the bedroom." Sakura placed the toys in the children's arms and gently pushed them up the stairs.

"What the hell?" Naruto was the first to question when the children disappeared on the second floor.

Kakashi got to his feet and took away the imaginary dust from the clothes with a few light slaps. "Well..." He decided that plucking the band Aid at once might be a little painful but he knew the relief would come quicker. "Sakura and I are together." He said seriously as he wrapped a arm around her waist, bringing the woman close to him, where he wanted her to stay forever. "In a relationship." He added belatedly.

Naruto got up off the couch abruptly, ignoring Hinata who was trying to keep him calm. "Since when?" He asked incredulously. "Sasuke barely left the village and for God's sake you have a daughter together." He screamed as he looked at Sakura and ran a hand over his face in exasperation. "He's on a mission to protect the village and you two are-"

"I would choose my next words carefully if I were in your place, Naruto." Kakashi said in a deathly cold tone, making the room temperature drop a few degrees.

Sakura saw Naruto swallow hard the words he was ready to say and she almost laughed the way Kakashi might be terrifying when he wanted to be.

With a slow sigh, she stared at the noisy best friend. "Sasuke is not here, Naruto." Sakura stared at him, challenging him to interrupt her. "And it's not because of a mission, he's not here simply because he doesn't want to be."

"That's cruel Sakura-chan." Naruto murmured. "Sasuke is protecting the village from the outside. I will be Hokage in a few months, he will be my right arm, he promised-"

"He promised to support you." Sakura interrupted him and this time her voice had an angry tone. "I understand that he will die to fulfill the promise he made you on that damn day where you almost killed each other." She took a step toward him. "Sasuke doesn't do this for me or for Sarada. He does it for you." She tapped a finger on his chest as she took another step closer. "He has promised to be your right arm, to help you protect the village where you can't be, for some sense of duty he owes to the acts he has committed before." She did not realize that the tone of voice was increasing with each word. "But he didn't promise me anything, Naruto. And I didn't promise him anything back."

"Sakura-chan, I know that you-" Naruto gasped.

"No. You don't know anything." She screamed. "He thinks of you as the only family he has ever had. Do you know how many times I've heard him say that you were the only family he had after losing his clan, his parents, and Itachi?" She asked almost breathlessly. "Even after Sarada's birth, he still repeated that damn sentence." She took a deep breath. "I gave everything I had for him, Naruto. It was not enough." She said in a low voice. "So don't look for me like I'm cheating on Sasuke because I asked him to stay." She spread the arms and pointed around. "He's not here, is he?" She asked sarcastically.

Naruto looked at Sakura for a few seconds and realized he did not know anything about what she really felt about Sasuke's absence and he felt horrible for never having asked her about it. He felt a lump in his throat to see how upset she was and when he looked at Kakashi and saw a threatening look in his ex-sensei's eyes, he swallowed hard to realize that he had hurt Sakura by judging her for something he obviously did not know and did not even bother to try to know. He stared at the floor feeling that he'd been a terrible friend to her in the last years, thinking that because she was with Sasuke, even though he was not around most of the time, it was enough to make her happy. He hated himself for being wrong.

"They were together before Sasuke returned to Konoha." Ino's voice broke the embarrassing silence that had fallen after the explosion of Sakura and Naruto.

"I knew it." Temari shouted almost cheerfully as she tapped Shikamaru's chest with the back of her hands. "I told you." She smiled slyly.

"You were right." Shikamaru said lazily, knowing exactly what his wife wanted to hear. "You know when that comes out it's going to be very troublesome, do not you?!" He asked rhetorically, staring at Sakura and Kakashi.

"Let's worry when the time comes." Kakashi answered nonchalantly.

"Typical." Shikamaru muttered.

"I'm so sorry." Naruto rubbed the neck nervously and stared at Sakura and Kakashi with obvious guilt in his blue eyes. "Why didn't you tell me?" He asked in an almost hurt tone.

"Because I knew what your reaction would be." Sakura said with folded arms and a scowl.

"At least I didn't disappoint." He said with a smile, happy to make her smile back. "Come here." He pulled Sakura into a tight hug. "I just want you to be happy, all of you." He said sincerely as he stroked her hair, ignoring the narrowing eyes of Kakashi and Hinata who were piercing holes in him.

"Is not he very old?" Kiba asked with a provocative smile.

"Kakashi-sama is in the prime of the springtime of youth." Lee replied, ignoring Kakashi's groan because of the honorific. "Sakura-san will be even more radiant now."

"Let this guy see the bright side of everything." Tenten sneered, pointing to her smiling husband. "I think you two match." She smiled at Sakura. "Sasuke is a little cold for you, Sakura-chan." .

"Kakashi-san is cold too." Shino grunted from the corner of the room, startling Choji that he placed a hand on the chest and grunted about not realizing that he had been there all this time.

Ino ignored the clowning around and walked over to Sakura, giving her an overwhelming hug, surprising her friend. "I want you to be happy." She let go and looked into Sakura's green eyes. "Promise me you'll be happy now." She said in a pleading tone, deciding to support Sakura at least once more.

Sakura nodded with a silly smile, hugging Ino again, happy to have her best friend's support again.

"I'll want all the juicy details later." Ino whispered as Sakura released her. "How does he look under the mask?" She said loudly and made a suggestive motion with the eyebrows, causing Sakura and the other women to laugh.

"Shit!" Naruto shouted. "You won the damn bet."

* * *

"Hokage-sama." Kakashi felt involuntary shivers run down his spine and slowly lifted the head slowly, in time to see Sakura locking the door behind her and making some hand seals that he recognized as sound barriers. He swallowed the saliva that had gathered in his mouth with some difficulty, when he saw her walking slowly toward him, like a feline prepared for a deadly hunt. He felt like a prey, but even against all the instinct that was shouting for him to run, he stood still looking at her.

"My lovely assistant and most efficient medic-nin in all the five nations. How can I be helpful?" He asked trying to look casual as usual, but he feared that he was failing miserably.

"Oh." Sakura circled the large table that separated them. "I can think about a lot of things you can do for me." Sakura said in a low tone as she massaged his shoulders. "Hokage-sama." She whispered in his ear and did not lose the way he shivered.

"Damn, Sakura." He moaned.

She smiled triumphantly, content to get the effect she wanted. "You're almost giving the mantle to Naruto." She said as she sat on his lap. "Before that happens I want to do some things in this office."

"In this office?" He echoed her statement in a questioning tone as he squeezed her hips in a not very gentle manner. "At this table, maybe?" He said in a hoarse voice and picked her up in a fast movement, deciding to abandon the prey position and take on the hunter's posture, setting her down on the table, ignoring the papers and scrolls falling in the floor. "Like this?" He whispered hoarsely in her lips.

"Just like that, Daddy." She responded in a desperate tone as she circled his hips with her legs, bringing him close, arching her back with the abrupt contact and smiling when he groaned audibly.

"What was this?" He questioned as he spread kisses down her neck, getting lost in the wonderful scent she emanated.

"Did you like it?" She undid the buttons of the green vest he wore over the tight shirt. "Do you remember where that comes from?" She bit his throat when his vest, blouse and mask disappeared somewhere on the office floor.

"Icha Icha Tatics." He answered breathlessly, pulling out her shorts, impatiently. "Chapter Six."

"Seven." She snapped back and got lost in the way he caressed all her body. "Daddy." She lay down on the table, closing the eyes tightly while she lost herself in his touch.

Kakashi stared at the woman in front of him, the face blushed, the pink hair scattered across the wooden table and the perfect, shapely body exposed before him. At that moment he felt his heart speed up more than it was considered normal. Kakashi wondered what he had done in his life to deserve someone like her. He shook off these thoughts knowing very well he did not deserve her, but he was grateful to have her and he decided that she would be his, while he breathed. "You're very naughty." He held her hands behind her back, embarking on the fantasy she had begun.

"I was a bad girl?" She whispered.

He almost gave up on the game when he heard she say that sentence with those innocent green eyes staring at him in fear. But he knew better than appearances. Sakura was a good actress and in the last few months he had discovered that she had a perverse pleasure in catching him by surprise in some scene from one of his favorite books. He fought bravely to keep the posture before that woman who would surely be his death one day. "Do you know what  _Daddy_  does with bad girls?"

She nodded with a terrified look and looked away from his dark eyes. "Punishment?"

Kakashi smiled wickedly and almost laughed in victory when she shuddered. He suspected she was enjoying it more than he did, but he knew she would never admit it out loud. "Yes." He clasped her hands with chakra strings and whispered in her ear. " _Daddy_  will punish you now, baby."

* * *

It was a lovely Sunday morning and he drank the delicious, bitter tea she had served in the same navy blue mug he wore when he went to her apartment a few years ago. He wanted to ask why she had kept his mug when she was with Sasuke, but decided against it. He already knew the answer to that question anyway.

Sakura sat next to Sarada, serving breakfast for everyone and Kakashi never felt so happy as at that moment. He glanced at the messy bun she wore and the smudge of molasses that was gracing her cheek after Sarada's unsuccessful attempt to decorate the pancakes. "Marry me?" He asked as he stared at her, unable to take his eyes off her for a second.

He almost laughed as she dropped the fork and admired the wide green eyes, looking at him with obvious surprise and perhaps a little apprehension. "What?" When her voice finally came out, he realized that it was really apprehension that was in her eyes.

"Marry me, Sakura." He asked again with a smile as he took her hand.

"I ..." She exited and he felt the heart stop for a brief moment, he felt fear, fear of rejection and he hated the sensation. "Why do you want to marry me?" She asked in a low voice and he realized that she was unsure and that maybe it was not because of him. He felt his jaw clench at the thought that Sasuke might have spoiled the self-esteem of this incredible and wonderful woman.

"Because I love you." He took her other hand and kissed both of them, before holding her face. He decided he would abandon his own insecurities and fears to give her everything she deserved, because Sakura deserved to be loved and he would give her everything, even if she did not ask. "I love you, Sakura, and I want to spend the rest of my life with you and Sarada." He smiled at the girl who was smiling at them. "And with all the children I'll do in you, in the future."

"I'm not a baby-making machine." She screamed outraged and he laughed, accompanied by Sarada, who certainly was not understanding the context but laugh regardless.

"Is that a  _yes_?" He insisted.

She nodded and before he could say anything she hugged him, pulling him close. "I love you Kakashi." She pulled away and smiled shyly. "And I would like to have your child. Maybe one." She smiled widely.

"Two." He grunted and took something from inside his waistcoat, placing it in her hand.

"What is it?" She asked before opening the hand and gasping when she saw a ring resting on the palm. "When did you get it?"

"It has been some time." He smiled and tore the ring from her hand, placing it on her ring finger.

Sakura knew he would never tell her since when he was planning to marry her or how long he had that ring. She did not mind that he had made the proposal with the same monotonous tone in which he talked about the weather. All that mattered was that he loved her and accepted her with all the defects and baggage she carried. She would love him back and would do anything to make him happy as long as he wanted to stay by her side.

* * *

Sakura looked around and sighed in defeat as she realized it was foolish to keep looking. "He did not come." Kakashi's voice made her turn to face him.

"It's the most important day of his life." She said sadly. "How could he not be here?" She asked rhetorically with a pang of irritation. "Did you send a scroll?"

Kakashi squeezed her shoulders gently. "I sent the scroll along with our wedding invitation."

"I bet he didn't read either." Shikamaru contributed wisely and Sakura wanted to yell at him, but did not, because deep down she knew it was a great possibility that Sasuke had not even read. "And Naruto is late." Shikamaru grunted.

"Why did you send to him an invitation from our wedding?" Sakura asked biting the lower lip.

Kakashi smiled, noticing her nervousness. "I'm marrying with the mother of his daughter, it's only fair that he knows." He said in the same monotonous, carefree tone he usually wore, and Sakura was grateful for it, because that tone that might have unnerved her endlessly on some occasions would also calm her when necessary.

She nodded. "He may not have read the invitation but a Hokage scroll is important, he should have read." She insisted. "Naruto will be named Hokage today, Sasuke should be here."

"Sasuke is not here?" Naruto's disappointed voice shrieked behind them.

Sakura opened the mouth to respond but was interrupted when Shikamaru jumped into Naruto yelling at him for the delay and saying that a Hokage could not be late for his own appointment, ignoring Naruto's protests about Kakashi being responsible for his delay and something about students learn from teachers.

She watched as Naruto was dragged to the Tower by Kakashi and when the people below clapped and shouted at the simple appearance of the war hero, Sakura decided that even if Sasuke was not there, Naruto would be the best Hokage that Konohagakure ever saw. Sasuke would be supporting him from a distance and Naruto had many people around, to help him to realizing the dream of a lifetime.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't hate Sasuke, but I don't like SasuSaku. I just want to clarify that I only created the short relationship between him and Sakura because from the beginning I wanted Sarada to exist in this story. Sorry if I make Sasuke look like an idiot sometimes it's all my subconscious's fault.


	12. Family Dinner

_Current days._

The front door opened and the three adults at the table turned to see the newcomers. "Mom, I'm hungry." A male voice screamed, making Sasuke frown and look at Kakashi and Sakura with a silent question stamped on the face.

"The children." Sakura clarified, getting out of the chair and walking into the kitchen that could be seen from the dining room. "We're here." She shouted over her shoulder to alert the two kids, while focusing on chopping vegetables and meat.

Sasuke looked at the white-haired boy wearing a navy blue mask, just like Kakashi. Then he looked at the girl with dark hair and eyes that was next to the boy who was obviously Kakashi's other son. "Sarada?" He whispered to himself at the thought of how much that girl who was a complete stranger to him, at that moment, reminded him of himself when he was a child.

"Papa, who is him?" The girl asked with a confused expression, walking towards Kakashi.

Sasuke felt the left eye twitch in annoyance as he saw Kakashi's arm around the girl's waist in a protective gesture that irritated him more than he was willing to endure on that day, that was becoming more terrible with each passing hour. What upset him most was the fact that was Sarada who sought comfort and protection in Kakashi's arms. Sasuke noticed how the boy positioned the body on the other side of Sarada and put a menacing look on his face, which he would mock audibly if he were not an Uchiha.

"He's not so different from the photos you saw, Sara-chan." Kakashi said in a sweet tone that made Sasuke realize how much affection he felt for her, and what it seemed at first glance, the affection was reciprocal.

"Uchiha Sasuke?" Sasuke heard the boy say in a slightly muffled voice.

"Sarada's father." Sakura stated as she set plates and cutlery on the table. "Distribute." She said to Kakashi giving him a light slap on his shoulder. "And you two are going to take off those dirty clothes and wash your hands before dinner." She said to them in a tone that left no space to argument.

Before Sarada left, Sakura took her hand and whispered something in her ear that was inaudible to the others.

Sasuke watched as Sarada sighed, almost defeated, before turning toward him. "Welcome back,  _father_." She said dryly before following the boy into the hallway.

Sasuke opened the mouth to reply but she disappeared before he could say a single word. He knew he had plenty of things to cover up with her and he would have to devote time and effort if he wanted any relationship with his daughter. In that small space of time he spent in that house he realized how much he had lost the two people he should keep close to.

Kakashi was concentrating on the task Sakura assigned, distributing the plates and cutlery across the table, cheerfully. "How many children do you have?" He looked up and faced the man in front of him.

"Three." Kakashi said with an obvious smile in his voice. "But not for long. Sakura is expecting twins." He added with a giggle.

Sakura entered the dining room at that moment and stared at Kakashi with a deadly look. She looked at Sasuke's petrified face and restrained the desire to laugh at the distinct expression that adorned his face. "He's lying." She nudged Kakashi with her elbow. "I'm not pregnant." She clarified and placed a steamy pan on the table before disappearing into the kitchen again.

"Still." Kakashi shouted at her.

"And I don't intend to stay." Sakura's angry scream echoed through the house, followed by another laugh of kakashi and Sasuke felt as if he had been intruding on a very personal moment and that feeling was not well to him.

He ran his hands over the face in a frustrated gesture that did not go unnoticed by Kakashi. "Come with me." He heard Kakashi say before disappearing down the hall where the children had gone before.

* * *

Kakashi walked down the hall toward the back of the house. "I'll show you the house while Sakura finishes the lunch." He glanced over his shoulder to make sure Sasuke was following and almost sighed in relief as he watched him walk behind him. "I lived in this house when I was a kid." He tried to start a conversation to ease the tension between them, even though he knew it would not work with Sasuke, maybe with Naruto he would succeed.

"How did my woman end up married to you?" Sasuke asked in an icy tone as he stopped in front of a very large wedding photo, placed in a gold frame on a corridor wall.

Kakashi looked at the photo that Sasuke was staring with such intensity that he thought the photograph could set on fire at any moment. He passed his hand unconsciously over the image of Sakura dressed as a bride. He would never tire of seeing how beautiful she looked in that white kimono and flowers decorating her pink hair. "I don't remember you being here to complain when I made her mine."

"Wrong answer." Sasuke turned his head abruptly to look at the old sensei, and he was almost sure Kakashi was trying to irritate him on purpose.

Kakashi sighed and walked to a sliding door, opening and waiting for Sasuke to pass for it, and closed the door behind them. In that momento Kakashi thought that this might be the last time he would see that picture on the wall. "I was with Sakura before you." Kakashi decided that telling everything from the beginning would be better, maybe make Sasuke understand his side, after all the Uchiha had become a little more understanding over the years. "We were together before you back to Konoha and get her pregnant."

Sasuke looked at Kakashi as if he had grown a second head and Kakashi sat on the garden bench, tapping the accent beside him. When Sasuke sat next to him, a little further away than Naruto used to, Kakashi continued. "Sakura and I were in a relationship before you returned to Konoha. I ..." He sighed heavily. "I kind of shoved her to you after receiving that scroll. I knew how much she loved you when she was a teenager and I realized how you felt about her after the war. And after all that you went through, I thought you deserved a chance. "

Sasuke blinked a few times. "I don't believe in you. Sakura never told me anything about it."

"Have you ever asked anything about her?" Kakashi asked dryly and received an icy look in return but that did not make him retreat. "Sakura told me many things, because I just asked."

Kakashi stared at Sasuke seriously. "Contrary to what most people think, I think you're in this category, Sakura doesn't speak openly about her feelings." He knew Sakura would kill him if she knew what he was about to say, but he wanted Sasuke to see things from a different angle. "She doesn't talk about how she has not gotten along with her mother since she was a teenager and how she felt smothered in her own home or how she fell in love with Naruto sometime before the war but decided to give up of him, for Hinata to have a chance... Or how she will always forgive the people who hurt her but don't so easily forgive who hurts the people she loves."

Sasuke felt as if he had been hit in the stomach by one of Sakura's powerful punches. He knew that he had been away for most of Sakura's life and that the short time he spent with her, they talked about the trusting issues he had and about the missions he did or the time he spent with Orochimaru and how it had affected him, but he did not remember them saying much about her. In fact, Kakashi was right, he never asked about her. They talked about their past as genin, her work at the hospital, Sarada and what happened at the Hokage Tower, but never about her. And the only time she opened her heart to him and asked for something was the night he left her, thinking she would wait for him no matter how long he left.

"When she left the house she shared with you, I offered her this house temporarily." Kakashi continued after a few minutes of silence. "Almost a year later we took back what we had, before the two of you left Konoha on that one-year mission." He explained calmly. "Some time later I asked her to marry whit me and she accepted."

"She refused my propose." Sasuke said bitterly.

"I remember her saying something about it." Kakashi said thoughtfully.

* * *

_Sakura was putting Sarada on the futon in the hostel room where she and Sasuke were in the midst of the journey back to Konoha. She looked at the beautiful sleeping girl and smiled. "She's healthy." Sasuke's voice made Sakura turn toward him. She laughed at the thought that anyone else would have said adorable or cute, but he was Sasuke._

_"She's adorable." Sakura answered with a laugh and lay on the other futon where Sasuke was already settled._

_"Sakura." He caught her attention again. "I think we should get married."_

_Sakura blinked a few times and stared at him. She did not expect he would say that, and she did not lose the way he said it, as if she were talking about a mission that needed to be completed. She knew she should be glad he was proposing, but something inside her heart ached, because deep down that was not how she wanted to be asked to marry. "Why-" She cleared the throat that had suddenly become dry. "Why do you want to marry me, Sasuke?"_

_"It's the right thing to do." He said with a confused expression. "We have a daughter together." He took a hair strands from her face and waited patiently for her answer._

_Sakura smiled faintly and ignored the burning behind her eyes and the lump in her throat. "I don't think that's a reason to marry, Sasuke." She said in a calm, sweet voice, trying not to let go of her frustration in him._

_"You dont want to marry me?" He asked in an almost hurt tone._

_Sakura ran a hand over his face in an affectionate gesture to calm him. "When you have a different reason than the one you just said, ask me again, Sasuke-kun." She turned to the side and sighed with relief when she felt he had turned his back to her so she could shed the tears that wanted to fall so desperately._

* * *

"After that, have you ever made the proposal again?" Kakashi asked in a monotone. When Sasuke shook the head, he placed a hand on his shoulder. "Sakura wanted you to tell that you would marry, because you loved her."

Sasuke felt his jaw tighten as Kakashi's hand fell from his shoulder. He realized that he had made many mistakes with Sakura and he could not blame his childhood, the death of his parents and clan or the time he spent away from Konoha. He chose to be that distant person and he hated to admit it to himself. He realized that Sakura deserved more than what he had offered her in the time they spent together.

"I'm not going to ask you to like this, Sasuke." Kakashi stood up. "But please, accept it, Sakura and I have been together for years now and I don't intend to give all this to you, not again. She is my wife and I love her so much as I love our children." He walked toward the sliding door. "Dinner is ready, the smell is making me salivate." Kakashi entered the house without waiting for an answer.

Sasuke stood in the same place for some time. He was not comfortable with that situation and he did not want to see Sakura in Kakashi's arms or any man other than him. He knew he was selfish on his part but he also did not want to see how Sarada treated another man as a father while he was treated with formality and coolness.

He wondered how much his absence had affected them, and decided he would solve it soon enough. At that moment he decided to go back inside the house where the smell of Sakura's food was making his mouth salivate too.

* * *

The three kids sat on one side of the table while the adults occupied the other side. Sasuke stood facing Sarada and felt less uneasiness as Sakura sat next to him, serving a plate of the foods he liked best.

"No masks on the table." The voice of the little girl he remembered Sakura calling by the name of Sora, declared petulant, making him remember a teenage Sakura.

"We have a visitor, Sora-chan." Sarada stated as she took the tomatoes off the plate, placing it on the boy's plate beside her, making Sasuke frown unconsciously as she discovered that his daughter did not like something he loved so much.

"I'll not take my mask." Sakumo snapped, prodding a piece of tomato with the fork.

"If I lower the mask, you do too?" Kakashi asked gently, gaining all of Sasuke's attention.

"Sakumo wears the mask because he is just like Kakashi." Sakura said, leaning slightly toward him. "He says if he did not wear the mask, all the years that Kakashi passed hiding his face, would have been in vain." She giggled and Sasuke smiled, unconsciously.

"I heard that, Mom." The boy grunted irritably. "Father doesn't show the face to anyone but us. I will not show my face to strangers." Sasuke could swear that there was a pout beneath the boy's mask after he had said that last part.

"Sasuke is not a stranger." Sakura said in a calm tone.

"He's part of the family, Sakumo-kun." Kakashi took off his mask and graced everyone with a smile. "He is the Sara-chan's father."

"He has hardly aged since I saw his face for the first time." Sasuke felt the Sakura's elbow nudging his side, taking him out of the state of torpor in which he fell. He just did not know whether it was the statement Kakashi made or the revelation of the face he had never seen.

"The genetics of my clan are incredible." Kakashi winked at Sakura and they both laughed.

Sakumo take off the mask, while Sarada grumbled that a father did not abandon his son for ten years.

"Sarada." Kakashi and Sakura said in unison with a tone of rebuke.

"I didn't tell any lies." Sarada snapped angrily.

Sasuke swallowed the food that was in his mouth with a little difficulty. "I've been busy." He tried to keep his voice calm. "There are a lot of threats, outside the village."

"Threats that prevented you from visiting or writing a simple letter?" Sarada said indignantly, pouring out years of resentment at the man before her.

"You're too young to understand." Sasuke knew it was redundant, but he did not know how to defend himself, not when she looked at him with such anger shining in her dark eyes.

"I'm a kunoichi." She spat. "If I'm old enough to murder someone, I can understand your motives for abandoning me and my mother without even looking back."

"Sara-chan." Sakumo and Sora both said at the same time. Sakumo took her sister's hand, trying to calm her down. Sora drew small circles with the hands, on her leg trying to comfort her. They knew how she reacted whenever the Uchiha was mentioned and now with him in front of her, they expected the worst.

"You don't even care." She said in a husky voice, making it obvious that she was close to crying.

"Is enough, my dear." Sakura intervened. "I don't like arguments during dinner."

"We always argue during dinner." Kakashi contributed.

"You're impossible, Kakashi." She turned to him abruptly. "I'm trying to appease things here."

"You don't have to yell, Sakura." He replied, a small smile curving his lips.

"There we go again." Sakumo, Sarada and Sora went back to eating, ignoring their parents's loud voices. Sarada completely forgetting the previous anger and she suspected that Kakashi's intention in annoying their mother was exactly that, to change the focus of the discussion.

Sasuke blinked at the scene before him, three children eating unconcernedly, Kakashi irritating Sakura and smiling every time she yelled at him, and he wondered if that was what a real family looked like, because he did not remember the dinners of the Uchiha family being anything like that.

"Alright, alright, my Cherry Blossom." Kakashi held up the hands in surrender. "I just have one more thing to add." He said seriously and Sakura folded her arms waiting patiently for another argument. "Did you make dessert?"

"One day I'm going to murder you." Sakura screamed, pushing the chair, making a loud noise on the floor. Disappearing in the kitchen where Kakashi knew she was getting the dessert he asked for, even with the threats to his life and welfare.

"Sometimes I think you have a death wish, dad." Sakumo said with a crooked smile and Sasuke agreed that this boy was exactly the father's copy.

Kakashi laughed lightly and looked around the table, smiling largely when Sakura returned with a dessert platter in her hands. "Another peaceful family dinner." He declared with a satisfied sigh. Looking at Sasuke who had the same stoic appearance as ever. "Welcome back, Sasuke." He declared belatedly, not realizing that day had more impact on Sasuke than all the years of teaching he gave when he was the sensei of the little genin Uchiha.


	13. To make you happy

 

 

For the first time since he was no longer a special and disciplined ANBU agent following strict rules and protocols, including stipulated schedules, Kakashi was early.

Hatake Kakashi, the legendary copy ninja, former bearer of the sharingan, the last survivor of his cla, war hero, Rokudaime Hokage, would be completely bound by the most beautiful cherry blossom ever to set foot on the ground of the five nations, and he couldn't be happier.

He was ecstatic. Contrary to what Hiranui Genma had said, he was not terrified. Anxious, yes, for sure. After all he would make a promise that day, a promise this time he would keep, unlike every other time he failed. He would love Sakura for the rest of his days.

Tucking both hands into the sleeves of his black kimono, he looked around the garden. There were flowers scattered all over the place, a mix of white, red, and gray adorning the landscape, and Kakashi wondered where the Yamanaka girl had found flowers in those strange tones.

A path covered by a red carpet lay before him and for the first time in his life Kakashi felt butterflies flying in his belly. He has always heard people talking about that feeling when they see their loved one, and he has read that line a few times in Jiraya's novels, which he particularly found cliché. But standing there staring at the scenery before him, silly things like butterflies flying in his belly became real.

He realized for the first time the seriousness of the situation. "I will married."

"Did you just realize that now?" Naruto's amused voice brought him back to reality, making him realize that he had said that sentence out loud.

"Yo." He greeted trying to look as serene as he wanted to feel.

"Kakashi sensei." Naruto put both hands on Kakashi's shoulders, squeezing a little tighter than he deemed necessary. The serious look on Naruto's face made Kakashi wince slightly, which was unusual for him, but that day was becoming more and more peculiar. "If you disappear leaving a log in your place during the ceremony, I swear I'll hunt you-"

"Naruto." Kakashi interrupted him, taking Naruto's hands off his shoulders and placing his own hands on both shoulders of the man in front of him. "I would never do that to Sakura."

Naruto's sigh of relief made Kakashi think that maybe he didn't inspire confidence in his former students as he knew he should. He ignored that thought. "I let her go once, I won't make that mistake again." He stated more to himself than to anyone else.

Naruto nodded. "Sakura-chan deserves to be happy."

"You've never said anything so true in your all life." He responded with a genuine smile that was obscured by the black mask covering the lower part of his face.

* * *

She was beautiful, and it made him discover that those damn butterflies had the ability to migrate from the belly to the heart easily. He had never felt his heart beat so fast in his entire life, not even when he faced death by Pain's hands, or during the last war when he had to face people he swore he had killed before.

But at that moment he thought his heart could stop spontaneously at any minute.

He watched as she walked slowly down the hall, treading those delicate feet on a wooden geta over the red carpet. Each step closer, he was bestowed with her beauty more clearly and he had never so much wished to have Obito's sharingan borrowed back, as he wanted now.

The second she approached him and Kizashi kissed her forehead looking at him with a smile but a warning look behind all sympathy, Kakashi nodded to the future father-in-law silently promising to take care of her, tooking her hand bringing her close, willing to show that this place was where she belonged forever.

"Kakashi." The whisper between her clenched teeth made him realize that maybe he had pulled her too close.

"Sorry." He murmured, running a hand through his unruly hair, not bothering to mess it up any further.

He watched Sakura cover her mouth with the loose sleeve of her beautiful white kimono and couldn't resist the urge to pull her hand down. Forcing her to laugh out loud. He dodged in time for the slap she sent toward his head. "Moron." She said a little too loudly, with obvious irritation.

"Don't blame me, you're cute when you laugh." He teased her and was pleased with the result when she blushed a beautiful shade of red.

"You guys are ridiculous." Tsunade's amused voice brought them back to reality.

"Shishou." Sakura squeaked indignantly.

"Can I start with this or will you still play some more?" It was Tsunade's only answer.

Sakura looked around and noticed all the faces staring at them with different expressions. Konoha's elders and the Hyuuga clan's elders had a disapproving look, while some other guests laughed and their closest friends had unchanging expressions, making Sakura realize that maybe she and Kakashi would act that way often, if their interactions were unresponsive to them.

"Start it now." She spat.

"Anxious, are we?" Kakashi said, raising his eyebrows suggestively.

"We're meeting here this beautiful afternoon..." Tsunade began the ceremony by interrupting Sakura's response and most likely saving Kakashi from some kind of impending pain, and he was grateful.

In a few seconds he was lost in Tsunade's words and the only thing he could focus on was the woman beside him, who was just minutes from becoming his wife, he take her hand unconsciously squeezing It. When she looked at him with those beautiful green eyes, he was completely lost and found that it was beside her that he wanted to be for the rest of his days.

* * *

"Kakashi." Sakura screamed in alarm as he took her in his arms and carried her into the house.

The ceremony had been swift and Sakura suspected it was due to Suna's imported saké that she and Kakashi had received as a gift from Gaara, which made Tsunade hurry. They had the first dance and soon after Kakashi dragged her to the back garden of the Hokage Tower, before Sakura could see it, they were away from everyone. Before Sakura could question her husband's intentions, she found herself being carried at a typically shinobi speed, through the empty streets of Konoha.

"You ruined my hair." She added as he walked down the hallway of the moonlit house through the windows. She knew exactly where he was taking her.

When he put her to bed, less gently than she had expected, Sakura almost laughed. "Anxious, are we?" She said, raising her eyebrows suggestively, as he had done before.

"You have no idea." He answered before pulling the obi out of his kimono, exposing the sleeveless black shirt underneath.

Sakura took off her geta effortlessly, using her own feet, and leaned back against the headboard to admire the view. She watched almost mesmerized as he stripped off his shirt and mask, ruffling his tousled hair even more. She didn't even realize she had licked her lips expectantly until he crawled over her and whispered suggestive things in her ear.

Before she could blink, her kimono was open and she heard him moan almost painfully as he saw what she wore underneath. "It's for you." She whispered.

Kakashi felt all the blood in his body run to places he didn't think were healthy, but it didn't matter, after all he had the best medic-nin of all five nations available to him if he had a cardiac arrest, and he was pretty sure that would have one if she continued to stare at him so shyly and flushed cheeks, wearing the sexiest lingerie he'd ever seen.

"Sarada is staying with my parents tonight." She brought him out of the dazed state he hadn't even realized he'd fallen into.

"Great, because I don't intend to finish this soon." It was the last thing Sakura heard before being snatched away by Kakashi for what would be the best experience of her life.

* * *

The next morning, in the Hokage Tower office, Naruto was drooling over the paperwork when a pain in his head made him wake up. He almost fell from the chair when he opened the eyes to see an eagle hovering over his face. "Damn, bastard Sasuke." He grunted before composing himself.

He took the scroll rolled off the bird's paw quickly, fearing the animal would peck at him again, because if that bird had half its owner's temperament, he was sure he would get hurt.

_I'm very far from Konoha, I can't congratulate you on your rise to the Hokage post. Congratulations._

_Tell Sakura I'm so sorry._

"Too late, my friend." Naruto declared to himself, mildly regretting the loss his friend had suffered without even knowing it.

Naruto didn't lamented so deeply for Sasuke because he knew Sakura deserved more than Sasuke was willing to give. He thought if Kakashi were the only one who wanted to give what Sakura needed and deserved, he would support them.

"We need to live with the consequences of our own choices." He mused, turning the chair toward the window to see the eagle departing toward the owner once more.

* * *

The sun came through the bedroom window illuminating everything around, causing a newly married kunoichi to open her eyes and smile unconsciously as she looked to the left side of the bed and saw a beautiful sleeping man beside her. She traced the bare chest muscles with the fingertips, smiling even more as he shifted. She knew he was tickled at a specific point, just above the ribs, and she was guilty of using it to her advantage in waking up this man who was too lazy to wake up alone.

"Good morning, sunshine." She teased.

"I like breakfast in bed." He muttered sleepily before turning his back to her and trying to go back to sleep.

"Me too." Sakura screamed before shoving him out of bed, pleased when the loud sound of a weight falling on the floor echoed through the room, followed by a painful moan.

"I'm too old for that, Sakura." Kakashi stood up rubbing his now aching back. When he looked at the beautiful woman lying on the bed, she was looking at him with hunger reflected in her eyes and he knew it wasn't the breakfast she was expecting him to give her. "Like what you see?" He asked, running the palm absently over his naked stomach.

"So much." She answered without delay. "But I still want breakfast when you're done." She added, smiling mischievously.

"I can guarantee you'll be hungry when I'm done." He returned her smile and Sakura decided she would never tire of looking at that smile.

Glancing at the man leaning slowly over her, Sakura realized that she had never been happier since Sarada's birth and she would do everything in her power to preserve that happiness.

"You smell so good." Kakashi's voice brought her back to reality and she laughed at his comment.

"You still smell like a dog, honey." She declared and put both hands around his face, swallowing the protests she knew would come after that statement, stealing his lips in a kiss that made them both lose the breath.

* * *

_A few months later_

"Remind me why I agreed to this?" Sakura grunted between clenched teeth, using all her dexterity as kunoichi to withstand the sharp pain.

"Because you love me." Kakashi answered as he rubbed her back, vainly trying to soften the pain he knew must be agonizing. "And we both agreed to grow our family."

Her gasping breath was the only answer to that statement. Sakura once again ignored Shizune's offer for the anesthetic dose. "I can handle it." She said more to herself than to Shizune. "Where is that woman when needs her?" She grunted irritably.

"I hope  _'that woman_ ' isn't me." Tsunade's scolding voice sounded in the hospital room bringing relief to everyone.

"You're late." Kakashi declared, no longer wanting to see his wife suffering like that. Kakashi knew Sakura was one of the most powerful kunoichis in the world and she was undeniably stronger than him, but seeing her squirming in pain to bring his son into the world made it made him feel helpless and it didn't please him at all.

"This is rich coming from you, Hatake." Tsunade sneered as she walked towards Sakura and laid her on the bed. "Ready to get this baby out of there?" She asked with a smile at the corner of her lips and when she received a nod from Sakura, she smiled genuinely and placed the hands flooded with chakra over her apprentice's protruding abdomen. "Lets do this." She whispered to Sakura.

Kakashi had never seen such a patronizing look on Tsunade's face and for the first time he realized that she loved Sakura like a daughter she never had.

"Let's bring one more Hatake into this world. Although I think the world is not ready for it." Tsunade stated and was pleased when Sakura laughed, letting Tsunade know she had been able to ease the pain.

Kakashi felt his left eye twitch with that offensive statement, but he decided not to piss off the woman who would take off Sakura's pain. "You can do it, honey." He whispered to Sakura that sweat was running down her temples with the obvious effort. "I'm here, I'll always be here." He didn't like to look so soft in front of other people, but right now all that mattered was her and he would say anything to make her feel good.

* * *

"You're still the copy ninja, Kakashi-sensei." Naruto declared with a silly smile as he admired the package in Kakashi's arms. "He's a copy of you."

Kakashi tried to suppress a laugh at Naruto's ridiculous comment but he was too happy not to smile at that moment. He looked at the baby wrapped in his arms and the woman lying in bed with the little black-haired girl beside her and felt completely happy, which had become constant since he had decided to open his heart to Sakura the night that he watched her on the roof. He would never regret that night.

"How do you feel having your first child, my rival and friend." Gai asked, his voice too loud for Kakashi's taste as he patted his shoulder harder than necessary.

"First, speak low, buddy." He tilted the head toward the two girls sleeping in bed. "And second, Sakumo is my second child."

The look of astonishment on Gai and Naruto's faces was almost priceless, but it was short-lived as Tenzo got up from his seat and walked toward the group. "Sarada-chan is senpai's first daughter."

Gai and Naruto's expressions changed from amazement to realization in a matter of seconds.

"I think getting out of here would be a good idea." Shikamaru stated, walking toward the door the moment he saw Sakura move on the bed.

"Wise words, you don't want to wake up this woman after she has been up all night feeding this little one." Kakashi added and was the first to disappear down the hall, not wanting to face the fury of a tired Sakura.

"Ah, Hinata said if you need to, you can leave Sara-chan in our home." Naruto said when everyone sat around the dining room table.

"I appreciate your kindness, but I want my daughter far away from your boy." Kakashi tried not to look offensive or threatening, but from Naruto's gaze he realized that he had failed.

"Oy, what's wrong with my son?"

"Beyond the fact that he's a boy, nothing." Kakashi answered naturally. "That's for you too, keep that pretty boy away from my daughter." He pointed to Shikamaru.

"They only have four years." Shikamaru grunted.

"How old was Naruto in love with my wife?" Kakashi grunted sarcastically.

"I was eight." Naruto answered without thinking. "Hey, this has nothing to do with anything."

Gai laughed out loud as the discussion continued and for a moment he thought that perhaps he should add one of his own line to that sum. After all he was still in the spring of youth and if Kakashi could have children, he would not be left behind.

* * *

_Three years later_

"Remind me why I agreed to this again?" Sakura grunted through clenched teeth, using all her dexterity as kunoichi to withstand the sharp pain of a third birth.

"Because you love me." Kakashi replied as he rubbed her back, vainly trying to soften the pain he knew must be agonizing, remembering exactly how he had done last time. "And we both agreed to grow our family."

"That will be the last." She grunted as she took a deep breath and soothed the pain, massaging the abdomen with her chakra-wrapped hands. "And where the hell is that woman?" She shouted at Shizune and an unsuspecting nurse who was preparing the sterilized materials.

"I'm not late, brat." Tsunade stated as she entered the room. "This child who decided to be born earlier than expected."

Kakashi suspected she was waiting for Sakura make a comment about her so she finally entered the room, but he decided not to comment this.

"Let's do it fast and please Sakura, stop putting more Hatakes in this world."

Sakura's laugh was like music to Kakashi's ears, so he ignored the offensive statement and focused on what was most important.

* * *

A few hours later he found himself sitting in an armchair with a package in the arms while his beautiful tired wife slept on the bed beside him.

"She's beautiful just like mommy." Sarada's voice echoed through the silent room.

"Papa, let me hold her." Sakumo asked with a serious and firm tone that is not characteristic of a three year old child.

"You're too small. Let the big kids do it." The beautiful seven-year-old said, pushing her brother slightly with a arm to take his place in front of the armchair.

Kakashi knew a fight was about to happen, which would probably wake Sakura and Sora, and he knew he would be blamed for it even if it wasn't his fault specifically. He could already hear Sakura's voice screaming that it was always his fault for getting her pregnant again, and even if he argued that he couldn't have made a baby on his own, things wouldn't improve for him. "Okay." He whispered to the pair in front of him. "When mom wakes up she decides who can hold the baby."

The mention of Sakura calmed both of them and Kakashi sighed with relief as he leaned back in the chair, lulling the baby in his arms.

"I'm not small." Sakumo grunted after a few minutes of silence.

Before Sarada could make another comment, Kakashi stepped forward. "Of course not. You're big for your age." He stated, knowing exactly what his son wanted to hear and ignored the way Sakumo grimaced to Sarada as the girl pushed him, harder this time. "Weren't you going to Boruto's house?"

"I bet I'll get there first." Sakumo whispered as he hurried toward the door.

Sarada snorted and ran after him. "In your dreams, brat."

"Sarada." Kakashi called with a slightly louder whisper. When she looked at him over her shoulder, he lowered the mask and smiled. "Stay away from that blond boy."

She rolled the eyes, but Kakashi didn't miss the smile that took her lips before she nodded and ran through the door.

"You're ridiculous, did you know that?" Sakura grunted sleepily.

"You'll thank me one day." He answered, still smiling.

"Boruto is a good boy." She replied.

"Not good enough for my daughter."

Sakura covered the mouth with her hand so that laughter would not wake the sleeping baby. She looked at Kakashi and smiled broadly. Her disheveled gray hair, the mask that hung around his neck, and the tired but tender look directed at the baby of pink hair in his arms made her sure she had made the right choice years ago. "I love you." She whispered, not realizing she'd said it loudly until he looked at her.

"I love you, Sakura." He smiled and leaned down to kiss her lightly on the lips. "Thank you so much." He whispered on her lips.

Sakura could only nod, she knew he was thanking her for their family. She knew the darkest secrets and his painful past, and she knew their family was everything to him. She would die to preserve what they had because she would give the world for them and knew that Kakashi would do the same.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next chapter will, probably, be the last. Thank you for the kudos and the comments.


	14. Chapter Final

_Current days_

"Why the hell didn't you tell me, bastard?" Sasuke's hoarse and obviously angry voice echoed through the walls of the pub, causing some shinobis to drag their chairs and stools away from the scene before them.

"Urgh." Naruto's frustrated moan wasn't answer enough to calm the angry Uchiha and he knew it, but there wasn't a single word he had to say to his old friend.

"Bring two more doses, please." The Hokage asked the waiter, knowing it would be a long night and the only way to get over it was with saké.

Sasuke pulled a stool and sat next to Naruto at the bar. "Leave the bottle." Sasuke ordered the bartender not to dared disobey him, and ignored the startled look on Naruto's face.

"Why did not you tell me?" He asked a little less fiercely this time.

"Kakashi-sensei sent you the wedding invitation." Naruto muttered as he took a sip of sake, wondering what would be the least stupid thing to say next, because based in the glint of death wish that reached Sasuke's one exposed eye, he'd said the wrong thing.

"If you had read the damn invitation, you would have seen Sakura's name written on it." He wanted to add an insult at the end of that sentence but decided not to make things worse.

"I thought she loved me." Sasuke retorted after a silence that seemed like an hour to both men.

Naruto was surprised by his friend's almost desolate tone and couldn't resist putting a hand on his shoulder. Naruto knew that Sasuke was a weak drinker and after the three glasses of sake he had in less than five seconds, he knew it was the alcohol talking, but there would be truth in every word that came out of Sasuke's mouth and he decided to take that rare opportunity.

"Sakura has always loved you. In fact she still loves you." Naruto saw Sasuke's expression get hopeful, and he regretted saying every word.

"Sasuke." He paused and sighed. "Sakura still loves you, but now it's the same love she feels for me." He hated having to be the one to bury the deepest kunai in the open wound, but someone would have to. "The only man she loves, like... a man." He fumbled a bit and blamed the saké for that. "It's Kakashi-sensei... So have no hope of getting her back." He took another sip before finishing. "You've been gone for a long time."

Before Sasuke answered, a strange silence fell over the noisy pub and Naruto looked toward the door to see the reason for the sudden silence. He swallowed hard to see Shikamaru walking toward them with Kakashi beside him. He noticed that the shinobi around them drifted from where they were, looking between Sasuke and Kakashi with obvious fear, after all they knew of Kakashi's wife's previous relationship.

Naruto warned Kurama mentally to prepare if Kakashi said something provocative toSasuke and he had a feeling that it would happen sometime, inevitably.

"What are you doing here?" Naruto asked bluntly, genuinely surprised to see them there together at that late hour.

"I just wanted a drink." Shikamaru answered absently and sat on the other side of Naruto.

"Bullshit. I bet you're running from your wife again." Naruto mocked.

"Aren't we all?" Shikamaru answered lazily as he stole Naruto's drink, ignoring his protests.

"I never run away from Sakura." Kakashi grunted as he sat next to Shikamaru.

"She kicked you out." Naruto and Shikamaru said at the same time.

Kakashi laughed nervously and scratched the back of his neck.

"What did you do again?" Naruto asked curiously.

"This _'again'_  really offended me." He put a hand over his chest in a dramatic gesture. With a sigh he stole Shikamaru's drink and swallowed it before anyone could see his face except Sasuke who had the benefit of Rinnegan, but Kakashi didn't care since he had seen his face before. "Believe me, you don't want to know." He stated with a funny tone.

"I wonder how you are still alive." Shikamaru grunted.

"Years of practice." Kakashi said with a smile evident in his voice.

"My rival." Gai's voice crossed the bar as he stumbled toward the small group. "A dare." He shouted as he got close enough.

"It's our opportunity to leave." Naruto grunted at Sasuke.

"I don't want to go anywhere." Sasuke grunted back, pouring drink into the glass.

Naruto realized that his friend was darker than usual and decided that maybe a night of drunkenness was all Sasuke needed to heal his broken heart.

Shikamaru looked to the left where Naruto was filling Sasuke's glass and then looked to the right where Kakashi and Gai were starting a drinking contest. "Tonight will be troublesome." He muttered to himself. "I should have stayed home."

* * *

The frantic knock on the front door made Sakura stumble, cursing Kakashi for forgetting the key. She opened her mouth to give him a piece of her mind, but gave up the moment she saw him being carried by a very displeased Shikamaru.

"Is this serious?" She asked with a raised eyebrow, resting her hip on the doorjamb.

Before Shikamaru could answer, Kakashi lifted his head to look at her and easily stepped out of Shikamaru's grip, taking two half-staggering steps toward her.

Sakura almost laughed when he fell on her. Even in her sleepy state she was able to hold his weight easily. "Any explanation for that?" She asked, trying to hide the amusement in her voice from the pitiful state he was in.

"I would blame you..." He said before sobbing. "But I know you would put me to sleep on the couch."

"I told you to disappear from my sight, Kakashi. I don't remember telling you to go to the pub and drink till you drop." She replied.

"I hate to interrupt your conversation, but..." Naruto's voice made Sakura support Kakashi more comfortably on her shoulder to get a look in his direction. She hadn't even noticed that anyone else was behind Shikamaru until that moment.

"If I come home with him, Hinata will get us both out." Naruto grunted, a little disconcerted, as he rested Sasuke over his shoulder.

"What happened to him?" Sakura asked, completely surprised and genuinely curious.

"Same as with your husband, but for different reasons." Naruto clarified.

"Technically, we can say it was for the same reason." Shikamaru said looking at Sakura and she knew the reason for both men's drunkenness was her, according to Shikamaru of course, because she wasn't interested in speculating at all when all she wanted was to go back to bed.

"Put him on the couch." Sakura turned with Kakashi leaning over her, trying to ignore the shiver that ran through her spine at the way his lips were spreading kisses down her neck, even under the mask.

Naruto entered the spacious house and laid Sasuke on the couch, without any care.

"Take off his cloak and his shoes at least." Sakura grunted irritably. "Is it serious that you will let him sleep with this sword strapped in the hip?"

"Ok, ok, got it." He raised the hands in defeat and did as she was told, arranging Sasuke to make him comfortable on the spacious couch.

After completing the task, he walked to the front door and stood beside Shikamaru.

"Good night, Sakura-chan." Naruto said goodbye with a smile as Shikamaru waved a hand and turned to leave.

Sakura closed the door with her foot and didn't bother to lock it, because no one would be crazy enough to break into their house.

She looked at the man sprawled on the couch and realized that Sasuke had changed a little in the last ten years. Talking to him over dinner, earlier that evening, made her aware that there was no hint of resentment or any other significant feelings about him. She moved on and hoped he'd done the same a long time ago, but she was wrong, if his return and the surprise of seeing her married to another man were any indication.

Sakura lamented slightly about it. She never wanted to hurt Sasuke and she really hoped he could fix things with Sarada at some point, but she would never give up on Kakashi, the love she felt for him, and the family they built together.

"Don't look at him like that." Kakashi's almost angry voice made her look away from Sasuke.

She was surprised by the jealous tone he used, because Kakashi never acted jealous in all their married years. "Let's go to bed." She muttered as she turned off the living room light and went upstairs without saying another word, ignoring the incoherent phrases he was saying about murdering the man lying on the couch.

She closed the bedroom door after entering, carried Kakashi to the bed, taking off his vest and sandals shortly thereafter.

"You're very, very beautiful." Kakashi's hoarse voice made her look in his direction and she gasped as he sat on the bed abruptly and pulled her into his lap, too fast for her to react, reminding Sakura why he was considered one of the most feared ninjas until today.

"You are very drunk." She grunted, but smiled as he took off his mask and spread kisses down her neck.

"I want to make a baby with you." He said as he laid her on the mattress and placed his body over hers, letting his hand wander under the thin evening dress she wore.

Sakura couldn't hold back the moan that escaped her throat as his fingers reached her bare thigh.

"I gave you three children, Kakashi." She said when caught her breath.

Kakashi raised his head and looked into her eyes with an intensity that made her shudder involuntarily. "I'm a lucky man, aren't I?"

Sakura opened the mouth to answer, but was interrupted when his tongue plunged into her mouth, letting her know he didn't expect an answer to that question.

* * *

Sarada walked toward the backyard with Sasuke beside her.

After much insistence from Sakura and Kakashi and an almost desperate request from Sasuke, she relented and decided to give her absent father a chance. But it was Sakumo who convinced her that a week ignoring the man, was enough for the him to learn that he should not spend so much time away from his family.

"What did daddy do this time?" Sarada asked to Sakumo that was idly watching as Sakura punched a defenseless tree so hard that there would probably not be a single grain of dust left when it was over.

Sasuke ignored the stab in his chest when he heard Sarada calling Kakashi 'daddy' and looked toward Sakura.

"Sakura." He called taking a step toward the angry woman. He stopped walking when he felt hands around his arms. Sarada held him to one side while Sakumo held him to the other side, surprising him. He gave them a questioning look.

"Never approach her when she's angry." It was Sora who answered Sasuke's wordless question and he relaxed shortly thereafter, deciding not to question who knew Sakura much better than he ever did.

"Sakura. Stop it." Kakashi's voice broke into the yard and everyone looked toward him.

He crossed the yard with a dishcloth slung over his shoulder, ignoring the warning glances he was getting from his children.

She turned abruptly, facing Kakashi with a deadly gleam in her eyes. "Either I punch this tree, or I punch you." She said through clenched teeth.

Sasuke saw the three children stepping back, but refused to do the same. He watched the exchange with interest, as he had during the last week when he returned to Konoha. He wondered more than once if his relationship with Sakura would be like this, if he hadn't left it for so long.

When Kakashi's hands circled Sakura's waist, Sasuke stiffened. He hadn't seen any physical exchanges between the couple yet, and watching that made his stomach churn.

"I already apologized." Kakashi said with a completely regretful tone.

"What did daddy do this time?" Sakumo asked.

Sakura and Kakashi looked at the audience who were watching their exchange.

"Oh, hey Sasuke." Sakura greeted.

"Yo Sasuke." Kakashi said at the same time.

Kakashi looked at Sakura as if asking permission, and when she nodded he looked at his children again. "Daddy did something irremediable." He rubbed the back of his neck nervously. "But it was completely unintentional."

"You will have a little brother... or sister." Sakura stated with a less annoyed tone to Kakashi's relief.

Sarada, Sakumo and Sora rushed toward them, hugging Sakura collectively.

"I don't understand why you were so angry." Sarada said as she pulled away from Sakura's hug.

Sakura refused to say that Kakashi had lost a drinking contest against Uncle Gai and undid the contraceptive jutsu she used, before giving her the best night she's had in years. She tried not to be upset with him, because he was too drunk to think coherently that night.

"In a few years, when you're married, I promise we'll have this conversation again." Sakura answered as she walked toward the house.

"I don't want to get married." Sarada replied.

"Good girl." Kakashi stroked her head as he had done with Sakura a thousand times when she was still a genin. "Keep thinking like that, honey."

"Hey, where's Uchiha-san." Sakumo asked, to no one in particular.

Sakura and Kakashi exchanged a look and shrugged, knowing that it was very likely that Sasuke felt like he was intruding on something particular and disappeared using the Rinnegan.

* * *

Kakashi sat next to Sakura, leaning against the headboard as he watched Sakura breastfeed the beautiful little girl with white hair and green eyes. He wondered how a newborn could have eyes so vivid as those of the little girl resting in the arms of his beautiful wife.

"What are we going to call her?" Sakura's quiet voice echoed through the silent room, making Kakashi look at her.

"It's only fair that you choose since you've done most of the work." He responded as he stroked her hair and brought her closer.

"Rin." Sakura said calmly.

Kakashi stared at her in surprise and felt the words die in his mouth when his brain couldn't process anything to respond.

Sakura had heard many stories about Kakashi's teammates over the years they had lived together. She was absolutely sure she was the only person he talked to about the past and it made her feel special. And at that moment the only name that came to mind was Kakashi's former teammate.

She hadn't thought of a name because she wasn't ready for another child, in fact she didn't even want another child and was very vocal about it every time Kakashi mentioned the desire to grow their family.

But now with that little package in her arms, she thought she might even add another member to the family after two years.

"It's a good name." Kakashi said softly after many minutes of silence. "Maybe we can call the next Obito if it's a boy."

Sakura smiled. Here was the teasing she knew would come, and she would be lying if she said she didn't like the way he constantly teased her. She loved every little detail about him, annoying as it was.

"If we have another baby, with an emphasis on _if_..." She murmured. "I will let you choose the name."

"That's very kind of you, my cherry blossom." He decided not to mention anything about her choosing the name of all their children so far.

"I want to see first." A voice echoed down the corridor.

"There goes the precious peace and silence." Kakashi grunted as he stood, walking to the door and opening it to see the other three brats pushing each other in the hallway.

"If you keep your mouth shut, I'll let each one hold a little." He warned as he stepped aside, making room for them to enter.

"The older first." Sarada whispered as she passed in front of the others and walked toward the bed.

Kakashi closed the door and leaned against it, reaching into his back pocket, reaching for the orange book with frayed pages, but before taking the book out of his pocket he looked up and watched the children sit on the bed around Sakura and little Rin.

Then he took his hand out of the pocket, giving up reading, folded both arms across his chest, and felt that comfortable warmth warm his heart, something that often happened around his family. The only thing Kakashi could think of at that moment was that he couldn't have wished for a better life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I loved writing this story and I hope you enjoyed it.


End file.
